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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Lavender and Honeydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: drowning_queen
    Elite Ratio:    5.44 - 245/270/52
    Words: 160
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 827
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1491



    Description:
       Based on a prada add.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLavender and Honeydots
    -------------------------------------------


    A brush of silk–

         There is the flutter of expensive fabric
         the gentle tapping of 3-inch heels
         the exchange of cloying floral perfume
         a subtle twining of two sets of legs

    Our angles have bent and blended
    into the rustle of skirts and tights
    the careful nudging of polished shoes
    the white of knuckles clutching purses

    Our knees are millimeters apart
    warmth traveling between them
    the crackle and spark of novelty
    the tentative teetering of promise

         And below the chains and flowers
         our pulses trip-hammer staccato
         we are connected at toe and ankle
         toe and heel, hands and hems

    A clattering clash of keys and clips
    dangles in the space between
    the floor beneath us washed and waxed
    slides our soles toward each other

    We’ve mixed our colors well together

         An ocean full of lavender
         dulcified with purest honey
         the pale and blush of lilac
         braced by the strength of gold




    Submitted on 2006-02-10 13:48:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is cool. You take small pictures... the bits and snaps of each moment, put them together, and describe them so well they make a film in my head. Better than a film... more like a dream because you incorporate sensations and actual textural feels. It's like a slow motion crash of two people.
    Jessica
    | Posted on 2006-07-27 00:00:00 | by parabola | [ Reply to This ]
      this is an amazingly colorful read. it took me away from my flicker computer screen for a minute and tossed me into a pure cinematic picture show. btw ur title for this one is great. i luv the title and the poem did not disappoint. this is certainly one of the best poems on this site.

    so well done.
    | Posted on 2006-02-14 00:00:00 | by childs | [ Reply to This ]
      This was like a feast for the imagination. Really good imagery. The thing is, so many of the images could have been many things. Really just brings everything together, you know?
    " An ocean full of lavender
    dulcified with purest honey
    the pale and blush of lilac
    braced by the strength of gold"
    I especially enjoyed this stanza... just beautiful imagery. Absolutely beautiful. Wow, keep writing.... (haha, not like I ever say "You shouldn't write anymore.") Peace, LucyDiamond
    | Posted on 2006-02-10 00:00:00 | by LucyDiamond | [ Reply to This ]
      You've created a sensuous tapestry of touch, tint and taste so unrelenting that it feels as if the reader has witnessed colors mating in a pool of pleasure. Based on the endless description of both toe and heel, hem and skirt, legs and fabrics; you could easily torment those with exhibitionist tendencies (and foot fetishes), sophisticated lovers with hearts racing and hands groping. Very nice imagery here. Nicely done.Take care. Bill.
    | Posted on 2006-02-10 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]
      You know, I'm not gonna go into this poem. I just wanted to say that I've noticed your writing evolve into something more defined and polished. Your diction and the varied thoughts you've put across has definitely expanded - or maybe other writers on this site have pushed you onwards at an exponential rate - it sure has with my own writing, truth be told.

    What I will say is that I hate those stereotypically dumb blonde Prada-wearing socialites that traipse around in the city... sure, they look pretty, but it's such a devoid and mechanical beauty to me. A five minute conversation with them and I'm already yawning by then, ya know?

    Hmm... what I get from this is your appreciation for fashion and how it relates to you, what with you being a woman and all (personally, I don't think most guys give too much of a damn what they wear as long as it's comfortable and looks ok lol)... although I do think that everyone is a fashion whore to some extent... even deliberately wearing something against the grain of fashion is still a fashion statement, however much they say otherwise.

    Sorry, I lied, I did go into this... I can't help it lol... I think your last strophe was beautifully worded and expressed by the way.

    Yup, just a short note of appreciation (short for me anyway - you know how I prattle on lol).
    Peace,

    Jase
    | Posted on 2006-02-17 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]
      ok so i read this, and i re-read it, i want so much to hate it.

    idk it's just so against the grain of what i like. and maybe if i read it published somewhere i could turn my nose up, but damn is it beautifully written.

    really you have one of the most beautiful voices and styles i've ever read, and if you could get your self on a flow of things i think you could go somewhere with writing, but for now, you being the little gem of this site, is better for me on a selfish level cuz i feel like you're ours and the world can't have you yet. so yeay for us, the elite.

    i'd like to see the add, is it online anywhere? i dont watch enough tv to ever come across it or i never have, but it's been a while since i've watched anything, idk. if it's online somewhere give me the link if at all possible or i'll look if you don't know, but i'd like to see where it's all coming from, watch it and see if i see what you wrote idk.

    but again i thank you for writing so beautifully, you're truely an inspiration for us heathens.
    | Posted on 2006-02-19 00:00:00 | by Skillessbasterd | [ Reply to This ]


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    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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