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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: silent confessionsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Roula
    ASL Info:    18/female
    Elite Ratio:    2.72 - 46/64/45
    Words: 77
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 1132
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 450



    Description:
       mad at my mom


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotssilent confessionsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I live a prolonged existence of loneliness
    no throne to sit upon as I confess my secrets
    with silent screams erupting inside me.
    I fear a pain that will rip me apart
    and for the last time I am chained down.
    My heart of ice melts with water running red,
    my teardrops stain the paper
    on which I wrote my apology to you
    and now my words are smeared.
    I'm lost in my silent confession.




    Submitted on 2006-02-12 19:48:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      sounds like you need to work things out with yourself...and learn to accept what ever may lay ahead...talk to them if they shut you down then forget them...they aren't worth your timfe of day...but they'll never give you the acceptance you are looking for until you take pride in yourself
    | Posted on 2006-02-13 00:00:00 | by tara lee | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem gives me the feeling that the character has great difficulty communicating with the one who the confession is for. Perhaps the loneliness is the separation that is caused from not being able to speak openly. people can have others around and be very lonely. There are a few things here that make me think this: silent screams, being chained, words being smeared and the silent confession. It is a sad poem that does leave it off on a depressive note. Another thing that strikes me is: “and for the last time I am chained down” which I will get to later. There are a few things that do need correction: line three there is “errupting” it should read “erupting” line four “appart” that should be “apart” and line 8 there is “appology” that should read “apology” I do wonder about the “no throne to sit on as I confess my secrets” that makes me think the character is humble or modest. There is no declared measure of resolve with the lost silent ending, however like I said earlier I will get to that one part that is the being chained no more that might be something that is implied as an action one will take or an attitude the character will have. It is a short write but has some great feelings I wish there were more to this story. Nicely done,

    ~mike
    | Posted on 2006-02-12 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
      this is a really good write...welcome to the site BTW...like i said it was good.i understand the point of it anyway keep up the good work
    | Posted on 2006-02-12 00:00:00 | by LostInYerTears | [ Reply to This ]


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