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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: the most luxurious paindots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: pasardspandora
    ASL Info:    17/f/nc
    Elite Ratio:    3.53 - 24/21/8
    Words: 150
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 191
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 716



    Description:
       I just want your thoughts


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthe most luxurious paindots
    -------------------------------------------


    I lye awake at night insomnia prevents sleep , and then he comes I embrace him , he engulfs me . I love him ,saintin my eternal lover , his passion seduces me , he does and must cause me pain, I would want it no other way , I bleed for him to the very last drop uncontrollable urges , he speeks to me and tells me to never stop until my body lays limp on the floor and my soul returns to him were it truely belongs, and my fresh corps starts to rot in the hungry earths soil, but until then it is a true loves fantisy I live for everything unholy because nothing pleases me I feed off of mine and others filthy pain until that one most faithful day when my blood rains upon him , and I feel the most luxurious pain




    Submitted on 2006-02-15 00:14:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I agree with 2Numb it is a very erotic dark piece, most of the time i would say poems like these are too short but your's is not, when i got done reading it, it felt done like you got everything that you need to put down out and that is awesome, there are a few lines in here that caught my eye and i like them a lot, one would be

    "his passion seduces me , he does and must cause me pain, I would want it no other way" i really don't know why but i laughed when i read it

    "my fresh corps starts to rot in the hungry earths soil" i just like this line because of the image that i got from it.

    "I live for everything unholy because nothing pleases me I feed off of mine and others filthy pain until that one most faithful day when my blood rains upon him , and I feel the most luxurious pain"
    the nothing pleases me part, i know how that feels every once in a while, and i love the ending to this piece it fits so well.

    ~liz~
    | Posted on 2006-02-22 00:00:00 | by Fadingperson | [ Reply to This ]
      This was wonderful...very erotic and yet dark and love and chaous...wow...so much is going on in this peice...it's not one of those things that really needs, or can be explained...and if it could im glad you didnt because it made this peice amazing. im going to add it to my favorites...dont change a thing.
    xoxox
    me
    p.s. check out some of my work sometime...
    | Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by 2Numb | [ Reply to This ]
      The most luxurious pain? I like but it needs more detail to your work. the words are there but it would be better if you painted an image in the mind of the reader that would allow how much you feel the luxurious pain.
    | Posted on 2006-03-06 00:00:00 | by smiling death | [ Reply to This ]



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