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    dots Submission Name: To Dreamdots

    Author: Texan_Poet
    ASL Info:    20/F/daydreaming
    Elite Ratio:    5.7 - 127/123/48
    Words: 145
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 898
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 879

       I wrote this a couple of days ago about my crush and I showed it to him on valentines and he ask me out on the spot!I dont have time to finish writeing all that I want to put in the discription so I will add more later in a comment,

    Keep it real,

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTo Dreamdots

    So many things I wish to say,
    But it seems like my voice
    Goes on vacation every time I try to tell you,
    Im to shy by far to tell you myself,
    So i'll tell you in this note,
    And pray that you'll say yes,
    To make my most secret dreams come true...

    A single red rose I wish to give,
    To those kind hands I so wish to hold...

    If just one of those beautiful smiles,
    That you give out so freely
    Would adorn your face,
    Belonging to none,
    Save the one whose heart you stole...

    A single kiss I want to bestow,
    Upon those lovely lips
    That enchant so many...

    You'll say no, of corce,
    But I hope you'll let me continue to dream,
    Of all the things
    That from my heart to yours,
    I wish to give...

    Submitted on 2006-02-15 09:56:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Favorite stanza:
    If just one of those beautiful smiles,
    That you give out so freely
    Would adorn your face,
    Belonging to none,
    Save the one whose heart you stole

    Wow. You have courage. I don't think I could have done what you did. Its a good thing you did it though you got what you wanted at the end and all you had to do was try. I would be too afraid of rejection. Maybe today I should do something daring. Who knows? It could be rewarding. It truly was a beautiful poem. I am glad that everything worked out for you.
    | Posted on 2006-05-16 00:00:00 | by Katrinagolden | [ Reply to This ]
      Very good, although you should proof for typos. That is really amazing, it always makes someone feel loved when you write about them. It really is the nicest thing you can do for a person (as my bf knows well).
    | Posted on 2006-04-25 00:00:00 | by orange | [ Reply to This ]
      A very romantic write indeed!
    A little typing error in the last paragraph (course)
    I'm sure there was a very happy person that received this poem from you.
    Keep the faith, girlfriend

    | Posted on 2006-04-24 00:00:00 | by AlabamaFarmGirl | [ Reply to This ]
      an amazing poem, I am glad that you got your crush. This poem makes so much sence. I am sure he loved every second of reading it. Keep writing.

    | Posted on 2006-04-12 00:00:00 | by Sharati_hottie | [ Reply to This ]
      this is really good...i liked the part about the voice going on the vacation..lol..
    although this is a good one, your other poems are better than this one..so i know you could do better ;)
    keep it up
    | Posted on 2006-03-26 00:00:00 | by chilwa | [ Reply to This ]
      i liked how you describe his smile and his attributes, but i dont like how you automatically assume he'll say no. the rest of it read nicely.
    | Posted on 2006-02-27 00:00:00 | by onepieces | [ Reply to This ]
      This wasn't bad at all. You must of had a perfect valentine's day for him to ask you out. I loved the sense of happiness, and well being. Great write, and I am looking forward to reading more of your work if it all is this happy in some way.
    | Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by alcoholcaust | [ Reply to This ]
      This was beautiful! I can totally relate! I love the wording in this poem. I'm glad that you got your crush and yeah...keep the faith! :)
    | Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by bleeding-soul | [ Reply to This ]
      ok,sorry I couldent write more in the discription,but yeah,I got my crush and although not all of my work is as happy as this(how could anything be happer?) most of it is really happy in some form or fashion,so I hope that everyone has a great day and revels in the love of the Lord,

    Keep it real,
    | Posted on 2006-02-16 00:00:00 | by Texan_Poet | [ Reply to This ]

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