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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Take Me Awaydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: xeternalshadowx
    ASL Info:    17/m/pennsylvania
    Elite Ratio:    4.72 - 121/137/55
    Words: 172
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 624
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1065



    Description:
       one of our bands more popular songs, i can send a mp3 of it if you ask on PM


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTake Me Awaydots
    -------------------------------------------


    I see the northern light
    Above the fall of man,
    Who trekked through forever night
    For one to take his hand.

    And I felt the pain swell up inside of me
    With the arctic flowing through my veins.
    And I felt a knife upon my swollen lung
    Taking my breath away to scream.

    An oath that has succumbed
    To the frozen depths below:
    A wish to walk onward
    But with no answer...

    So here I am left in the cold,
    Take me away or kill me one last time.
    Please extract me from this mold,
    Take me away, take me away!

    Something in the mind of a saint
    Gliding down with wings,
    It's getting harder to breathe
    Within spirits aflame.

    Man is born free
    And everywhere he is in chains:
    A budding rose thrown in the rain.

    So here I am left in the cold,
    Take me away or kill me one last time.
    Please extract me from this mold,
    Take me away,
    Take me away!




    Submitted on 2006-02-15 12:08:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Lyrics. Well, it's harder to comment, since we do not hear the music, but I will give my impressions. I read this as lost love, left out in the cold, suicidal, that "I can't go on living" feeling we all get right after she says she wants to be "friends".

    "So here I am left in the cold,
    Take me away or kill me one last time."

    To me this says "Tell me you love me or kill me." Just don't leave me in this cold (undecided). A love about to end, with one last plea for continuation. A knife to the heart seems the automatic response.

    Maybe I've missed the mark here, but those are my impressions. It seems a tough song to set to music, but I guess from what I know of today's songs, it probably is tame and serene. A good write.

    Phil
    | Posted on 2006-04-28 00:00:00 | by phil askew | [ Reply to This ]
      Yeah, it's cool. I like the lyrics, and it had a good rythm to it. And it has an interesting concept too. I don't think I've ever seen a song before that's about freezing to death, which is what I'm guessing this one is about. Although, one thing you could add, is a chorus, because sometimes that could make the separate verses tie together better to form the whole song, although that is actually something that depends on the music used with this song, and since I have no idea what that sounds like, it might be fine without the chorus. You're the best judge to what should or shouldn't be in your lyrics, I'm just somebody who's here to suggest a few things.

    Good lyrics + interesting original idea = good song.

    Good job.

    -Adam
    | Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by Trifecta | [ Reply to This ]
      this song makes me wanna bang my head into the wall and jump over a goat while stabbing myself in the eye with a spork. you rock man, [censored] rock on forever and may your mutha [censored]in band rock on! peace ass.

    ~Zach~
    | Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by insphered soul | [ Reply to This ]


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