Crush Proof Box
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Description:
I like this one a lot. It means a lot to me personally, but I'd still like to see suggestions and other things that could improve it.
Crush Proof Box
Watch you As you go One thing comes to my mind "I could Have stopped that If maybe I had tried." And now that You're gone It's hard to be positive And now that You're gone... It seems so long ago And even if that's when it started It was destined to be a failure I still thought about others And we could barely ever see one another Like we should have And suddenly now The realization has come; It's not alright Optimism, it's pretty hard In such situations Going on to believe Something could happen That's pushing your luck Way too far It always seemed Like I had a chance To regain all my lost priveleges But it looks like I was a believer of false truths It seems like I was never truly in the right posistion And I never even had a fighting chance... Optimism, it's pretty hard In such situations Going on to believe Something could happen That's pushing your luck Way too far I wish I was crush proof. I wish I could withstand any amount of pressure. I wish I was crush proof. I wish I was unbreakable. Watching you go Watching you go Watching you go Watching you go Watching... Optimism, it's pretty hard In such situations Going on to believe Something could happen That's pushing your luck Way too far -ooh, harmonization!- I wish I had the structure of a crush proof box Because this way I wouldn't feel all this pain I wish I had the structure of a crush proof box Because that way I wouldn't have to worry About this extreme pressure I wish I was more like a crush proof box... I wish I was more like a crush proof box... I wish I was more like a crush proof box... Watching, you go... (basically just repeating that until end of first part...) |
Submitted on 2006-02-15 13:51:05 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments
Pretty nice. It totally contradicts "Good News" (or was it "Bad News"..well, whichever had the one about you being so headstrong), but since you never mentioned those two writings being connected in any way, there shouldn't be a problem. Love the usage of metaphors, but I agree with the person above me, it's pretty basic. If the whole song was a metaphor (I'm not 100% sure how you'd to that, but I'm not the writer of this piece now am I?), it would sound better.| | Posted on 2006-10-30 00:00:00 | by Two Meters Away | [ Reply to This ] | This was a basic love song. I wish I knew how you sang it. My favorite line would have to be | "I wish I had the structure of a crush proof box." You seem to be pretty straight forward with the story. I would like the song more if you had more metaphors. You seem so straight forward during most of the song and then you go into being a crush proof box. It just doesn't seem that flowy to me, but I do really like the ending. Thanks for letting me read. Jinx | Posted on 2006-02-15 00:00:00 | by Jinxed | [ Reply to This ] | |
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