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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: nothing but a dream...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lil_gh0st_girl
    ASL Info:    16-F-NV
    Elite Ratio:    2.59 - 32/38/21
    Words: 153
    Class/Type: Poetry/Broken
    Total Views: 149
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 987



    Description:
       im in love with a guy...


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsnothing but a dream...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    i look at his eyes,
    and i see his life.
    i look in his eyes,
    i see all his strife.
    i touch his shoulder,
    keeping him there.
    i kiss his cheek,
    letting him no im here.
    he makes a move,
    his arms around me.
    hugging me dearly,
    making me see.
    his love for me is true,
    i saw it in his eyes.
    its all part of his strife,
    loveing me...keeping it secret.
    staying behind my boi,
    him behind his gurl.
    just knowing what we are doing,
    is making my hair curl.
    i finally confess to my boi about him,
    he understands completely.
    the whole time...whenever we made love,
    he was always thinking about his old love.
    the girl he made love to,
    her name was dove.
    everynight without me,
    thats what he was doing.
    when i told my boi about him,
    he thought i was cheating.
    but really...i was only dreaming.




    Submitted on 2006-02-16 23:57:12     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Ah, its not the greatest. I liked it and the whole thing about it. You spelled boy wrong. Its boy not boi. It seemed kind of choppy. But other than that I liked it. Good job
    inkpen
    | Posted on 2006-02-17 00:00:00 | by inkpen | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice little poem full of emotions... full of chat speak but it was good point get across clearly nonetheless and it is a WoW poem. This is a story about two lovers... which are still lovers even though he was cheating and then she was "cheating" but it was just a dream. The guy thinks about his ex while with her though and through everything they do it is his ex in his mind. She on the other hand has a friend or a person there for her when she is in need of some one to give her their shoulder to cry on. It was a very very nice poem

    Jose J. Ortiz aka Josyman
    | Posted on 2006-02-17 00:00:00 | by josymanthegreat | [ Reply to This ]
      i'm wid inkpen dat prhaps not d gr8est wrk. and very drastically smthin-smwhere was missin. topic was ordinary, bt cud b made bttr.
    nyways miles goin..
    wasif
    | Posted on 2006-02-17 00:00:00 | by wasif | [ Reply to This ]
      i love the several emotions on here.. it has many and while reading i felt i got those emotions that is very good for a writing ...
    and well .. keep on writing and you could do it better ..
    and dont forget to take a look to my writings please!
    peace and love!
    take care!
    victor!
    | Posted on 2006-03-11 00:00:00 | by vitoko | [ Reply to This ]



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