Your Favorite Wine by Black Rock Tractor

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dots

<< | >>

Submission Name: Your Favorite Wine dots

--------------------------------------------------------

Author:	Black Rock Tractor
Elite Ratio:	3.78 - 555/824/140
Words:	79

Class/Type:	Poetry/Love
Total Views:	1713
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	535

Description:

Your Favorite Wine dots

-------------------------------------------

My words went deep like an arrow I couldn’t pull out.
You questioned
Things believed, and
You panicked upon questioning
Only to find yourself lost
Between spontaneity and
Love.

The pasta is almost ready,
and the movie is stopped
At the end of the previews.
I know you like this shirt, and tonight
We will get drunk
On your favorite wine.
Tonight
We will fuck for hours,
And the arrow will come out the other side.

Submitted on 2004-05-01 10:13:19 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  i love this poem... i've been meaning to comment on it for ages but i never got round to doing it.
i wouldnt change a word in it. i think this is one of your best.
i cant say why or point out specific lines or really give you a useful comment.. but there is something about this poem .. and it's something that practically hits you in the face everytime you read it.. it's the kind of poem that makes me wish i had written something like it.
| Posted on 2005-05-04 00:00:00 | by girlinthephoto | [ Reply to This ]
  Hey, it's funny how you find great writes through great writers...I was visiting girlinthephoto's page and found you in her favorites...the title seduced my curiosity, and I sidestepped into your world of raw passion and wine and harsh reality of romantic emotion...Very glad to take this unexpected journey. The second part is the strongest, I think...I love how you discuss the present...the dinner ready (pasta...how seductive and almost verbally aromatic) and the way you know that the wine and the shirt will add to the assured physical passion..."I know you like this shirt, and tonight
We will get drunk
On your favorite wine."
So raw...so beautiful...so real! I love that. You have inspired me...and intrigued me...
This is a wonderful glimpse into the world of lovers with great passion...whether lasting or momentary. I am finding that my favorites list is getting far too long...but I can't risk losing great work like this! I must thank girlinthephoto.
Annie
| Posted on 2005-06-13 00:00:00 | by Anniehodgkiss | [ Reply to This ]
  there's so much i love about this: pain and pleasure, shirts and food and wine - i feel like it's saying, "stop me if you've heard this one before" but with words that don't mean that at all. (meaning, it's been done, but never quite like this) it really hits harder the more you read it, the more you make it apply to your life. great write! =]

~Blue
| Posted on 2004-05-07 00:00:00 | by blueorchids | [ Reply to This ]
  Black Rock Tractor,

This is perfect. Raw and real and breath taking. Those last few lines are simply brilliant. A definite favorite.

I'm loving your work so far. Thanks for sharing.

drowning_queen
| Posted on 2006-06-15 00:00:00 | by drowning_queen | [ Reply to This ]
  seems to be taken out of normal life. that's great. your image with the arrow works well and I like how you describe the situation. it's almost like I'm there. no real criticism here.
| Posted on 2004-05-01 00:00:00 | by eve1684 | [ Reply to This ]
  I think this poem needs some work. It didn't have a very good structure, although it was really nice. It was good, although I'd look for better wording to use on this topic...
~Jaime Lee Pachétte~
| Posted on 2004-05-01 00:00:00 | by darkened_soul | [ Reply to This ]
  "you have a deep voice!"
"....deep like my penetration"
Theres no quicker route into a chics knickers than the discussion of her personal life over her favorite wine...the best part...they usually like that cheap [censored].
Outstanding write.
-MyX
| Posted on 2004-05-31 00:00:00 | by MyX | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece? 7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?

9174

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.
102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
Once Again written by krs3332003
Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
Wasps written by Wolfwatching
To written by SavedDragon
Linger written by saartha
Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
Incubus written by monad
Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
new moon written by CrypticBard
Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
Wish written by Daniel Barlow
4th of July written by layDsayD
Giving written by jjd
Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
Bond written by saartha
Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
One Thing written by Wolfwatching
untitled written by Chelebel
Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
Whiteout written by layDsayD
In My Head written by faideddarkness

Enter your search terms Submit search form

Web www.eliteskills.com

[ Quick Signup ]
[ Lost Password ]

January 10 07
131,497 Poems
Posted

I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

[ Angst Poetry ]
[ Cutters ]
[ Famous Poetry ]
[ Poetry Scams ]

FontSize:
[ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3 It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.