[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Asking the Impossibledots

    Author: edthepoet
    ASL Info:    47-m-Pa
    Elite Ratio:    4.72 - 1476/991/125
    Words: 167
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1527
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1150

       My friend latentlylyrical gave me great advice and help with this poem.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAsking the Impossibledots

    Asking the Impossible

    In every century, I ask for the unattainable
    why demand the mundane?

    Fossilized turtle shells playing the Beatles
    A second sun eclipsing the moon forever
    Any religion that does not kill in the name of
    Waterfalls going uphill
    Clouds forming compassionate wisdom to read each day
    Snow flakes sprinkling rainbow colors

    Another century has passed and gone
    the world moves on
    with my requests going unanswered
    unheard or unheeded
    Either I am a fool or my wishes are being denied purposely

    Forget the impossible and the years wasted
    allowing days to vanish
    Time has proven to be diabolical when everlasting
    is the lesson one learned
    those heartless minutes scar deeply

    The Author of life has written my ending today;
    the bell tolls
    I shall not forgo another second
    without telling her
    She is my heart and the only real possibility
    I have ever known

    Edward K. Deputy

    Submitted on 2006-02-17 12:56:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      The Author of life has written my ending today;
    the bell tolls
    I shall not forgo another second
    without telling her
    She is my heart and the only real possibility
    I have ever known

    This is just absolutely beautiful , --I loved the original images througout and the poignant message of longing and love. Above all thoughI loved the ending---it melts like Belgian chocolate and is just soooooo memorable. I know this isnt a very constructive comment--better luck next time [LOL]---- I love it just as it is.
    Thanks Ed
    | Posted on 2006-11-28 00:00:00 | by Silverdog | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an incredible poem! Don't know how I missed it but don't seem to have commented previously.

    I love the last stanza - it's beautiful, pure and simple. From the heart which makes it undoubtedly sacred...

    You've done a wonderful job with this!

    Keep writing and stay in touch.
    | Posted on 2006-10-24 00:00:00 | by Beulah | [ Reply to This ]
      I love this it has a beautiful feeling to it and is very well written. This is a very passionate piece of writing and i am so glad that i had chance to read it :)..i am adding this to favs and will be back to read more asap :)
    | Posted on 2006-10-02 00:00:00 | by stormyskies | [ Reply to This ]
      I cannot think of what to write on poetry like this as it feels so beautiful and perfect.

    However I am unsure of the last paragraph.
    Who is "she": Your lover? The author?(but then it should be authoress!)

    I especially enjoyed the first 3 stanzas.

    What about:

    "Any religion that does not kill in the name of"

    Is that incomplete? Or perhaps there should be a fill-in-the-blank there!

    Keep writing! Always!
    | Posted on 2006-08-06 00:00:00 | by albery rinash | [ Reply to This ]
      Sometimes I think"love" IS asking the impossible.. but that's what makes it so desirable.
    Had to read this a couple of times but it gave me a good feeling while doing so.
    I like the first line where you ask for the unattainable.. and then proceed to describe certain (impossible?) things.
    Loved the part about the clouds and wisdom.. (that has ME wishing for it).
    and.. it would be so cool to see colorful snowflakes falling.
    Though this is a light poem I get a deeper meaning.. perhaps that we shouldn't waste time but look for the impossible in every moment.. and grasp the love we are given.

    Nice work, Ed.
    I enjoyed!
    | Posted on 2006-04-11 00:00:00 | by Intricate1 | [ Reply to This ]
      The Author of life has written my ending today

    That was a very impactful line there Mr. Deputy. That one line could have been a poem all in itself. For the meaning that one line holds can be taken in many ways!

    Either she ended your story in a bad way....or she ended it in a fairy tale sort of matter.

    I have always been intrigued by your wisdom with words and your ability to bring forth emotions that many can lose within themselves. You can give the person that feeling as a remembrance.

    Great job!

    Much love,

    Li Li
    | Posted on 2006-04-10 00:00:00 | by Munchie_1226 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is really quite beautiful
    You ask a lot of questions that seemingly have no answer and then
    You answer you own questions by turning to your heart
    That is really beautiful
    God Bless
    Your Friend
    | Posted on 2006-02-24 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      This is wonderful, ed!
    I really enjoyed the rainbow sprinkles of snowflakes and the reading of wise clouds.

    Goodstuff, my friend.
    | Posted on 2006-02-17 00:00:00 | by latentlylyrical | [ Reply to This ]
      I have always enjoyed reading your work, you have a wonderful way of making me think, and it is appreciated.

    I hope all is well with you Ed.

    Until next read

    | Posted on 2006-02-17 00:00:00 | by Forgiven | [ Reply to This ]
      Great! That was a terrific read, you have a great way of using words. I offer no critique for none be deserved. All I can tell you is that was a great write.
    | Posted on 2006-02-17 00:00:00 | by dustinamoody | [ Reply to This ]
      I loved the imagery of this. And your flow was good. I personally did not connect with this poem but I can see it is well written. And I find no faults with it. Nice job.

    | Posted on 2006-02-18 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]
      Forget the impossible and the years wasted
    allowing days to vanish
    Time has proven to be diabolical when everlasting
    is the lesson one learned
    those heartless minutes scar deeply

    wow... very poignant, my friend.. it has the feel of having lived for ages. we do wish for the impossible sometimes.. i love the line

    In every century, I ask for the unattainable
    why demand the mundane?

    and your ending wraps it up so neatly, speaking your love now, what is possible in this very moment.

    well done, my friend. it is a pleasure to read you again.

    | Posted on 2006-03-06 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      Having imopossible hopes and dreams then resorting to the possible and realistic may seem like settling for less. but the way you put it makes it seem like the loved one is an impossible dream that can be reached. it places the 'she' you talk about in a place of honour.
    very original
    well written
    even a bit humerous and playful
    you stand out from the crowd - i'll be looking out for more of your work as this is the first piece i've read.
    | Posted on 2006-03-10 00:00:00 | by Jody Dean | [ Reply to This ]
      I really enjoyed this write, Ed. So full of things we all wish for and know will never happen. Kind of like "what do you want for the birthday, Carol"
    "Peace in the world, of course"
    Kind of sad really but all too true.
    This poem flowed very smoothly for me. Easy to read and understand.
    Are you a fool to wish? I think not and I dont think you do either.
    The last stanza is shear beauty.
    Loved it.
    | Posted on 2006-07-18 00:00:00 | by wannabe1 | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    written by Daniel Barlow
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    written by Daniel Barlow
    written by Daniel Barlow
    You do, I Do written by poetotoe
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Alone in the Crowd written by SavedDragon
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Before, Now, & After written by SincerWritinAsh
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Estranged / Shocks written by Daniel Barlow
    Happy Saint Patrick's Day written by poetotoe
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    written by Daniel Barlow
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Linger written by saartha
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Summer written by layDsayD
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]