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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Forty-Ninedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: adnil
    Elite Ratio:    4.31 - 514/286/57
    Words: 132
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1533
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 820



    Description:
       I'm a rock hound and love going out to the rivers and pan for gold course I never find any but its fun just the same,thought I'd write this little ditty about the gold rush
    adnil


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsForty-Ninedots
    -------------------------------------------


    The hue and cry was them hills held gold
    For the taking of the lucky and bold
    Way back in Eighteen Forty-nine
    When the gold rush was in its prime

    A fever took men by the soul
    All that mattered was that yeller gold
    Gave up everything just to make a fine
    Didn't care about dangers only the dollar sign

    Some say there was nuggets bigger then a man's fist
    And the finding was easier then catching cat fish
    Though some only found it to be just a dream
    Other acquired it through plans of scheme

    We've come along way since forty-nine
    don't have to fight the Indians this time
    But the yeller gold still produces its own breed
    Of Schemers and dreamers and them thats full of greed




    Submitted on 2006-02-18 14:44:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      whoa, I happened to look at one line and I had a thought already. You sound like you have so much straw within you that you can spin into gold. Anyway, I have to scroll back up and read the poem.

    Returned. What an amusing read. This cheers me up slightly, although the tone of the poem is one of warning and lectures. Did you ever see the movie The Outsiders, made by Francis Ford Coppola? This poem reminds me of that movie, especially of Ponyboy and his nothing stays gold poem. Your work reminds me of the hidden tales of the countryside, ones where you tell on nights around the fireplace. It has that "past subject but current lesson" feel to it. (What is with my ramblings today?) This poem sounded very slick. Not greasy hair gel slick, but wise man slick. It's like a nagging grandpa who slips his lessons into his lectures slyly.

    I originally chose to read this poem because of the number title. I thought that 49 was a special number to you, similar to what 56 means to me. However, you surprised me more than I thought one could with a poem about the gold rush.

    The second line of the poem "For the taking of the lucky and bold" didn't have the material that the other lines had. Maybe insert a double-meaning word in there someplace?

    my favorite lines happened to be "Though some only found it to be just a dream / Other acquired it through plans of scheme / We've come a long way since forty-nine" because although they are simple, they tell a lot more than what making it complex could tell.

    You sound like you're from the Gold Rush yourself. That's one of the best things about poetry -- feeling that the author knows what he's talking about.

    I'm onto reading your other poems now!
    | Posted on 2007-12-09 00:00:00 | by contra mindy | [ Reply to This ]
      Here's to the forty niner's and here's to a very good and insightful write from you Linda.

    Frank.
    | Posted on 2007-09-18 00:00:00 | by Frank Maguire | [ Reply to This ]
      Really love this, really do. You have showed me here again that you are indeed a very good writer and you put a poor little fello like me in my place. This is another that I'll add to my fav's list.

    Keep up the good work Linda and have a most blessed and wonderful day.
    Your friend Jason. DO.
    | Posted on 2006-03-24 00:00:00 | by Departed One | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a really great write
    I like how you showed the fact that money is the root of all evil
    And money comes in many shapes
    I often think if millionaire actors are truefully as happy as they Look
    I can guarantee there not
    I would take Peace and calmness and enough money to live on versus all the money in the world
    Thats the Gods Honest Truth
    God Bless
    Ron
    | Posted on 2006-02-18 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Woah. I liked how you used some of the old Yank slang from the gold rush. It really added to the effect of the poem. Nice innovation. I also liked how you tied in the poem with today in the last stanza. Very nice. It's a good length, and the rhymes were pretty solid, except for the first rhyme in the second stanza. Sould doesn't rhyme with gold. Close, but no cigar. Other than that, it is an extraordaniry peice. Love it.
    Wishing for more,
    -Brian
    | Posted on 2006-02-18 00:00:00 | by Imadjinn | [ Reply to This ]
      Yuppers...the yeller feller still calls to men dont it? Only now its in the mines of technology and such. Very catchy write Linda and I had a good time reading it...livin in "gold" country and all, hee-hee!

    Thanks for sharing!
    | Posted on 2006-02-18 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]
      seems to me a good piece. alot of us forgot about beer for breakfast mornings, afternoons sleign away digging, and restless nights warding off all of the "indians?/engines..." , naw back in them thar hills, nothing but greedy eyed henchmen. yeah although gold will always conduct heat well, it won't however conduct the most honest of ...? huh ...dussin
    nice
    | Posted on 2006-02-18 00:00:00 | by dussin | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice idea, a piece of history, and a moral in there as well.

    Liked this a lot, anything that speaks of history is great by me.

    well done

    be happy

    Graeme
    | Posted on 2006-02-18 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
      Alright Linda! This was so good. I loved it. I loved the way you used the dialect of men back in the old west. This reminds me of Sutter's Fort and Old Sacramento. I loved the history you placed in this and how you tied it in with today. Greed is the same as it was back then. Now your flow was off a little, but it did not ruin the poem at all. Everything else was perfect. This is a sure fav of mine now.

    Maggie
    | Posted on 2006-02-19 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes indeed I did like read'n this poem! I'm a big Johnny Horton fan and he sang about the gold rush amoung other things. This poem reminded me of some of his work. I have read several of your poems this morn'n and this one is my favorite therefore it is gonna be added to "my favorites" You did a fine job of writing this one and I did so enjoy the read...
    !doc'
    PS...I found my gold mine in life, her name is Doris Jean...
    | Posted on 2006-03-06 00:00:00 | by dr_tigger | [ Reply to This ]
      Great imagination you've shown in this well written, original poem! Your use of simile and metaphor mixed with a deep underlying meaning gave this poem a nice, interesting, complexity. This is one of the best poems I've read on this site. You have a true gift. I wouldn't change one word of it. The only advice I could give you is: Please keep writing!
    | Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by lookhomeward | [ Reply to This ]


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