Description: Due to a comment made by bleusoul to one of my other poems, I was inspired to write this. (Thank you bleusoul!!!) I hope you all can enjoy this! Please let me know what you think....
Okay, I feel this needs some explanation. This poem is about someone who is dealing with pain and problems in general and who uses makeup to cover up their tears to the outside world. They feel the stress once again, when they remove their "mask" and come home.
Finally resorting to silent composure
I sit up and wipe my tear-stained cheeks
Streaked with make-up that once made
My face refined in sophistication.
Turning to the reflection in the mirror
I rinse off the hideousness of pain
With remover from a bottle.
I blot away the blood from torn lips
And paint on a new mask for the day.
After having done it for so long, I have taught myself
Not to allow its redundancy to trouble me
And my conscience looks away
As I make myself like all the rest.
But, it is at the end of the day
When the steaming water washes away my façade
That I break down in hopelessness
And the cycle begins once again.
This is really sad, the write and flow is amazing, but why cover up who you are, the facade only covers the truth, eb=ventually you.this person..wutever...they'll slip up, and reveal what they're hiding..great write, keep up the good work -camoflage
wow!! 'and my conscience looks away/As I make myself like all the rest.'... these are amazing lines... its so like that... you know you arent "everybody else" but sometimes you just crave the monotony and saftey of being "everyone else"... i really like this
i loved this it was wonderful, so many people do this change themselves to make another happy, instead of being our regular selves and happy for your ownself, the more you change yourselfto be like a person that everyone else wants you to be, it can cause you to go insane and loose who you really are, i lvoehowyou used make up as the mask in this one b/c its so easy for you to put on. great write! my favorite lines out of this was:
I sit up and wipe my tear-stained cheeks Streaked with make-up that once made My face refined in sophistication
that was wonderful the wording was great, beautiful write definatly a favorite!
Does this mean that you may just be slightly depressed? Weeell, we all have those times you know. You're only 15?? This is a terrible age when everything seems wrong and everyone ELSE seems so happy ('cause they all do what you described here). Its mostly teenage hormones though. Hang in there and get some help, no shame in that... A good poem though.
wow very full of imagery, i love the line "my conscience looks away" outstanding use of quality words, would probably be spoken outloud in front of others as well as it reads in my head, nice
It never even entered into my head that this piece was about abuse...because the mask one wears--whether painted on otherwise adopted---could exist for so many reasons--abuse just one.
I really liked this --especially-- "After having done it for so long, I have taught myself Not to allow its redundancy to trouble me"
Wow-- this speaks of a daily ritual--carried on, day by day--because it's a part of you---redundancy snd all---a need stemming from a deep conviction that your "REAL" face just won't cut it---it's not about abuse---but it could be. It is simply about getting through the day with a certain mask--and then when alone with your private thoughts,--the mask discarded---having that stress, tension--uncertainty---come to your mirror to mimic and haunt, to tease and taunt you---- This is just a cool write--Si;ver
It never even entered into my head that this piece was about abuse...because the mask one wears--whether painted on otherwise adopted---could exist for so many reasons--abuse just one.
I really liked this --especially-- "After having done it for so long, I have taught myself Not to allow its redundancy to trouble me"
Wow-- this speaks of a daily ritual--carried on, day by day--because it's a part of you---redundancy snd all---a need stemming from a deep conviction that your "REAL" face just won't cut it---it's not about abuse---but it could be. It is simply about getting through the day with a certain mask--and then when alone with your private thoughts,--the mask discarded---having that stress, tension--uncertainty---come to your mirror to mimic and haunt, to tease and taunt you---- This is just a cool write--Si;ver
A mask, we all wear them sometimes don't we? Once again you and your edjumacation lets you use those words that I can never fit in. Darn your vocabulary! Anyway, a very good and thought provoking piece. Bravo!
I feel like I'm listening to linkin Park with this one. I totally liked this, and I could relate as well. Anywho. I liked how you used symbolism and described your symbolism in your poem. That is a true talent. You always let your words boom off of the paper, and grabbed the attention of the reader. This is great.
I'm not sure I understood this right...but I think it is about abuse and trying to cover it up....Makeup hiding it from the world ..only to begin again when it is steamed away....Very nice work....Desi....it touched my heart...I could feel the pain.....
hmmm... this was very thought-provoking, and very sad. tragic that you would have to cover up bruises (that's what i assume you meant by "torn lips" unless it is a metaphor...) in order to face the world. not a healthy thing at all. if it is abuse, the cycle needs to be broken. if not, what are you hiding and "making up" for?!
I kind of like this... I also can't decide if it's about abuse, but I'm probably not thinking metaphorically enough. I think I've mentioned this before, but I really like your usage of words-- some of 'em are so INTERESTING!
Submission Name: Painted Mask
