Description: Another abstract poem of mine. This one was fun to write. If you need help, let me know. I think this one is really easy though. Have fun and enjoy. I might revise this one to as well in a day or so. Here's my rough version. If you got ideas...I'm listening.
All The Kings Men -------------------------------------------
Dispatch them as quickly as they are born.
That's right...snatch them from the hands of the womb!
Send them out into a world that is all but torn...
dear King.
And next make room for all the slain men and their tombs.
Lie to them...
as you have to yourself.
Tell the men they're brave as you hide in your private room.
Write the same condolences to the families...just change the names.
Watch from your castle watchtower as others race to their doom.
Look out closely at the sea of glassy eyes that have you to blame.
It's for the people!
It's for unity and peace.
Really?
In reality...this is all for you.
Your palace fills over with ones who kiss your feet.
Cheering you on as you wage war with kingdoms you wish to see bow to your will.
Pathetic!
Your throne and crown is one of the model for kings who cower.
You send others to fight your wars that you should fight instead...
But you don't like to get your hands dirty.
You feed off the praise of those who help keep you in power.
And aid you in counting up all the loot you gain from ones long dead.
May you choke on your feast tonight before you call up your whore.
Bath yourself in precious oils and roses to cover the stench.
The smell of your unholy alliance with greed.
It burns the nostrils.
Call up God in your speech to your kingdom as kings are prone to do.
Pray for victory as you send all your young and strong men out like that of cattle.
Remind the people daily there has never been such a king like you.
As you send their fathers, sons, and husbands out to a selfish and bloody battle.
You got alot of praise on this maggie so I am just going to tell you another great job done. Keep up the good work. If you get a chanse can you please check out some of my earlier stuff?
I think you have more than enough praise on this work, but a bit more would not hurt, would it? The format is original, precise and accurate, emphasising different points efficiently. The diction is spot-on, very crude at parts, but excellent and original. You are doubtless talented, and this work shows the magnificence of your words. Bravo!
hah! well, it's all been said up top, so I'm going to let you in on my favorite line: 'Dispatch them as quickly as they are born. That's right...snatch them from the hands of the womb!'
There's something about the tone in 'That's right' that really grabbed me and pulled me in.
well everybody can guess that it's about bush. this was a really good comparison between modern day political [censored]s and the tyrants of old. this was really good and at times it had me going "damn ight"
Pathetic! Your throne and crown is one of the model for kings who cower. You send others to fight your wars that you should fight instead... But you don't like to get your hands dirty. You feed off the praise of those who help keep you in power. And aid you in counting up all the loot you gain from ones long dead.
when i read that "pathetic!" i was shocked at ur anger but not amazed cuz many of us feel the same way. i think eminem put it well when he said that bush should pick up an AK and fight his own war instead of sending our youth over there to die. it's amazing how brave people can be. some of our soldiers don't even think the war is necessary but they're still fighting, even voluntarily. sometimes the good parts of man outshine the bad ones.
Yeahhhhhhhhhhh I get to be the first one to comment This is a great write where you open some eyes to the danger of war War is a dirty thing that is created only by the mind of a ruler who wants total dominance In Reality Most rulers wind up falling flat on ther face bacause they cant recatch the dream they once had Very well written Maggie God Bless Ron
By the way I dont know if I told you this but I have an Aunt Maggie Gods Honest Truth
Hi Maggie, Well I'll say one thing for ya, you flat evermore told off the King in this one didn't ya? Sounds to me like you could be talk'n about a politician or President as well. At any rate there is a whole lot of truth in these words you have written here! Very well composed... !doc'
this is a great piece you have written here I do like many of the images you have chosen to use. War is a plague to mankind and yet at the same time (in a twisted way) it is also economically viable, not for the little man of course, but for the profiteers. Now at a first glance I think of Bush but I am willing to bet some of this could fit any tyrannical leader who hungers for war.
8 stanzas recognized
~looking at the stanzas/image breakdown~
st1: starting with the first line that is a nice hyperbole it paints the feeling quite well of how young people are who fight. The second line for me has a doubled meaning one is the extension of the hyperbole on line one and also it means womb as in safe place another word comes to mind is placebo. Here both meanings carry on to the third line. The “dear king” part is thick with sarcasm at least that is how I sense it. and the last live does give off a feeling of dread also it is cynical, it takes a cynic to appreciate a good sneering hehe.
st2: (yes stanza I looked the definition up ) I like the two lines here, the lie perpetuates and the most destructive lies are the ones the liar believes in as well, that is where the personal conviction comes in. It is some work to unravel these lies but they do have their little trails as a good poet once said.
st3: the first line the hypocrisy of telling other they are braves and hiding in the room is well defined. The private also implies secretive just by its nature. the second line writing the condolences with the just change the names that does strike a chord with me, it has the rubber stamp feeling to it, there is nothing personal about a letter that looks like a thousand other letters. Of course we know the “king” does not write those letters in the first place, ha , I don’t think he can spell, sorry cutting humor there. The third line is even nicer imagery for me. The castle watchtower does imply a few things. One: it is an elevated height which may relate to the arrogance of the king. Two: the tower could also be a place where warnings are called from, from someone who “sees” the enemy. Three: the tower is another safe heaven that ties into the private room from the first line.
st4: a shift in the structure as the images relax and rhetoric is stated. The feeling is strong for me with its sentiment of it is for the people. It is claimed that things are for the general welfare of the people that is how so many hearts become entangled in the tyranny of the leader, it is almost like a child/parent syndrome with does have its ties into the womb part said earlier in the write. But the reality is, that it is for the benefit of a select few, yes mainly the king and his constituents, well said in verse.
st5: speaking of constituents they are in the palace in the first line here the “feet kissers” funny I read the next line and I get a certain scripture in mind “who is like the beast, who is able to make war with him” well maybe that is a future king. The bowing to your will, that actually is an ancient principle for kings were always very willful and very stubborn, especially ones the think they have divine precedence. thou shyte doth not stink! haha sorry getting a little goofy here.
st6: here it is more terrifying. for if it is about Bush it launches these two symbols into the realm of a prophetic notion. The throne by a king who is not decreed to have it is called les-majeste it is to usurp power from divine precedence and it is an ancient crime; here it does have modern implications when using king for president analogy. And the crown with the two Latin words cornu and corona. cornu especially; means horn and I am sure you can dig around for that in scripture. The crown symbolizes power now it is time for the terror part you write it is a model for others kings to cower. The model part is something that strikes me with dread, I wouldn’t want anything modeled after the monster we have. Now there is another interpretation that I do take for the model part and that is to show it off, it is less scary that way but still sort of an in-your-face type feeling. it drifts out of the heaviness of line one into more of a feeling with the wishing he would fight instead and I’m sure that is a popular opinion of such kings. the hands dirty is more plain but still are good additions it is just that these lines are in the shadow of a hard hitting first line. I like the praise of those who keep him in power, which is essentially what powers the machine, some have to be fooled. The loot I take as the spoils of war whether domestic or foreign.
st7: the calling up the whore. that may be the king’s wife but I doubt it, the whore may stand for the ideology or the gain the king has come up with. The precious oils and roses to cover the stench is wonderful and yet not as easy to crack. Rose of course is symbolic for love though it may also tie into Christ as the chalice to which his blood flowed, and the oil to anoint oneself is symbolized as prosperity as well as light. These two usages to cover up the stench, I think it is what makes a tyrannical leader turn into a godsend for some. the unholy alliance with greed is nice too and truthful when compare with some of today’s leaders.
the burns the nostrils I take as burning the nostrils of God for I do not think using the name of God in such fashion would please him and all those things gained they may smell sweet to some of those down here but it rises as a stench to the almighty.
st8: here it rings with many of the things said before but told in a different way. I love the usage of cattle. To use that imagery says to me that the herd as a whole is important to the wealth of the owner but each individual one is expendable. also the herd to me means conformity. And also eventually where do they go: to the slaughter! the next line I take two way one is that the king will not be forgotten for all the crimes and abuses of power, and yet also the king in his own eyes and his many constituents that he will be remembered fondly. the next line is also good it is more personal with the addition of sons, fathers, and husbands; that is something many can relate to.
~closing~
this is an exceptional piece I am very proud to have read it. All my views are my own but if they are harmonious to yours then that is great. I love this piece and if you decide there is improvement then more power to you. As for me I treasure it dearly. Excellent Job Maggie,
Well done Maggie...I'm sure King George will never figure it out (there are no pictures or color-by-numbers) You brought out some good issues with clever and well written lines A regal poem
You have hit the nail on the head with this one. I'm sure many feel the same way about King George as you do. I will not even get started with how I feel on this subject because I would be here all night.
I just want to commend you for capturing the image of the man. And he dares to call Sadam a dictator?
This one was indeed easier to understand, I immediatly knwe it was about Bush, but that didn't spoil the content at ll, in fact it was even nicer to read it and know what it was about, The metaphors are a lot better to follow then. I totaly agree with your point of view about this 'king'. As a non-Us citizen, I'm always thinking, sure bush. whatever. He wants Dutch men to be sent to afghanistan and he is actually a bit of threateing with it, like, we'd done the same for you. But this is not our war. Nor is ist America's war, but hey, the guy wants some land to add to his kingdom.
Oooh I really like this! Of course, I can't stand King George. This is perfect, you captured his blind arrogance, selfish motives and complete greed very well. He is a coward hiding in the Oval Office, waiting for Cheney to tell him what to do. I wish we could impeach him now. Great write, Traci :)
Maggie you write this passion and senerity and strength...my favorite of this is "Dispatch them as quickly as they are born. That's right...snatch them from the hands of the womb! Send them out into a world that is all but torn..." `alway write poetry, Cheryl
You nailed this to the wall with a dagger. This is so brutally honest that I found myself pumping my fist in the air at every line that ravished the most dishonest, corrupt, immoral, and yes, the worse president to ever hold the highest office in the land.
You refuse to be one of the sheeple who blindly follow him, bleating for the crumbs from his table.
Maggie, this is a superb cuuting diatribe on the Prez and his decisions, and actually tells WHY he's made them, I liked that, rather than just rail him, you give a reaon, with conceit and greed as the bad guys in here. Bravo!
Very nicely done, as you said, not hard to figure out, and a great read. You'll have a lot agree with you with this.
Submission Name: All The Kings Men
) I like the two lines here, the lie perpetuates and the most destructive lies are the ones the liar believes in as well, that is where the personal conviction comes in. It is some work to unravel these lies but they do have their little trails as a good poet once said.