[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Soldiers of Every Day Warsdots

    Author: Side of Keen
    ASL Info:    43/F/Middle of the US
    Elite Ratio:    3.51 - 21/23/5
    Words: 511
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 645
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2354

       These were written after meeting some folks at a Veteran's Hospital psych unit. They really did refer to themselves as soldiers of every day wars so I can't take credit for the title.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSoldiers of Every Day Warsdots



    Her signature color
    It followed her
    Swam around her like smoke.

    She was so many shades-
    The pale of a robin's egg
    The rippled cool of a lake-
    Which one did she favor?

    In the end it was
    A blue drinking glass
    Easily dropped to the floor-
    A thousand lethal stars
    In a blue tile sky.

    Perhaps it frightened her
    To watch the sky fill up with red.
    Or was she only grateful
    Not to be blue anymore?

    The Dance

    He wants to hold a woman,
    A real woman,
    Not the ones he buys sometimes.
    He wants to be married to someone

    For now he'll settle for a dance partner
    And anyone will do-
    He needs to feel her hand on his shoulder,
    The small of her back beneath his palm.
    A brief moment when the empty space
    Around him is filled with her perfume.

    But no one bothered to tell him
    The Thorazine Shuffle
    Is his complete repetoire now
    And that's a dance he has to do alone.

    Schizophrenia in Technicolor

    He likes to talk about
    His life as a roofer
    Years ago.
    He laughs when he describes
    How fast he could climb
    Up shaky ladders
    With bundles of shingles on his back
    And how he pounded nails for hours
    In the hot sun.

    Until the day the colors came,
    And changed his life forever.

    They ran like liquid arrows-
    Down the ladder,
    Across the parking lot,
    Up the steps of the elementary school.
    And he didn't mean any harm-
    He was just following the colors-
    But the pretty little teacher
    Behind the big desk
    Couldn't see the colors,
    And couldn't help but clutch
    At the pearl buttons at her throat
    As he frantically outlined in chalk
    The invisible rainbow
    On her floor.

    Submitted on 2006-02-23 14:38:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      hi i really loved your writing keep up ... its deep i loved BLUE the most its a bit dark and touched me alot though the rest are good too
    | Posted on 2006-02-23 00:00:00 | by koka | [ Reply to This ]
      hi...i must say this is way different and rather interesting...but cud u explain the piece...the three parts...i dont think i got the message the first time i read it...i think the poem has layers that i have yet to discover...maybe i'll read it over and over...and maybe then ill tell u what i gathered...i like the diction...robin's egg, liquid arrows...
    looking forward to more thoughtful work from you in the future,
    | Posted on 2006-02-23 00:00:00 | by mihir | [ Reply to This ]
      I love your imagry and get caught up in it. That makes the serious message much easier. I care for your people and I am touched by their plight.
    | Posted on 2006-03-03 00:00:00 | by feather | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Giving written by jjd
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Linger written by saartha
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    To written by SavedDragon
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]