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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: My Artdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 64
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 846
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 345



    Description:
       Take what you want out of this.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMy Artdots
    -------------------------------------------


    you have such a pretty soul
    I yearn to paint it
    and hold it
    and make it hold me
    you have such deep blue eyes
    that I yearn to bring the color from
    and spread it on my canvas
    and I want to love you for all eternity
    and I think that I could
    if only you were mine
    my work of art




    Submitted on 2006-02-24 13:46:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I can relate... those people, with so much character and soul and... attitude, even, they just, rock so hard. You just want to capture the essence of their basic coolology, and paint it. Coolology- would be the study of cool. I just invented it, I'm thinking of starting a university now. This is a great piece, it makes me want to find some people, and capture them in art, and keep them for me forever and ever... Poetry is like that too, huh? I enjoy reading and writing about really wicked neat people. Have a good one, and peace. -rue
    | Posted on 2006-03-30 00:00:00 | by Rue | [ Reply to This ]
      Hi! I'm an italian musician who are looking for a lyrics writers. can you help me? contact me and I will explain you, talking about me and my band. your poetries are very nice!
    My msn is: giapponeblu@hotmail.com

    see you soon
    bye

    Lele
    | Posted on 2006-03-01 00:00:00 | by sadneero | [ Reply to This ]
      hey thanx for yor comment on scarecrow i am glad it took you in
    alot of my post i dno not think about i just relax a write and then i read it i guess thats why so many get deleted
    i enjoyed your post from start to finish i think i've said this before that you are an artist with words
    very nicely done

    hope all is good
    thanx sandman
    | Posted on 2006-02-24 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]
      this is a very setting and graceful peace / . to me it feels like never beening able to have the love you want . .../ when love isn't enough ...what is ?

    janus
    | Posted on 2006-02-24 00:00:00 | by J W I | [ Reply to This ]
      Hello Jaz,

    With the exception of the second to the last line this would have been open to interpretation to either being a self-portrait or a portrait of another However with line 10 I think it is about another person.. These pieces can be made to be something beautiful when the right shading is applied. I think if you can somehow put some more artistic terms and try relating those in your piece that would help it quite a bit. You have color, canvas and paint. You could use shade, touch-up, background, etc. It feels like you did a sketch but didnít do into the detail here. I think lines 1 through 4 could be added to a little. I like line 5 and 7. Line 8 is also nice. The best part is the last two lines. You could try to eliminate some of those ďandĒ words but if that is what you like then donít listen to me. Other than that is it a nice piece, take care and keep writing,

    ~mike
    | Posted on 2006-03-06 00:00:00 | by inspirit999 | [ Reply to This ]
      after reading this piece...I dunno...I kinda got this "aww, that's so sweet" kinda feeling...very adorable...thanks for sharing...lovely...just lovely
    | Posted on 2006-03-07 00:00:00 | by reveries | [ Reply to This ]


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