This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17.
It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different.
All content will be deleted. Backup anything important.
--- Staff
Roleplay Cloud -
 

  Off

Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password
Roleplay | Viral news today | Music Theory

Brand new start


Author: Kaila Turley
ASL Info:    15/F
Elite Ratio:    2.93 - 52 /43 /18
Words: 126
Class/Type: Poetry /Love
Total Views: 893
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 831



Description:

thie poem is about a girl/boy expressing what the other means to them


Brand new start


you're the angel of my life,
and i don't know what i'd do,
i find myself just thinking...
what would i do without you?

you made me reach for that star,
and i never cared how far,
i love you with all of my heart,
you gave life a brand new start.

you're the meaning of my life,
and i don't know what i'd do,
i sit sometimes just thinking...
i'd be lost if i ever lost you.

you're the reason to my life,
and i don't know what i'd do,
i sit sometimes jsut hoping...
this love we share is true.

don't let this drift away,
distant and apart,
don't take away this chance,
you give life...
a brand new start




Submitted on 2006-02-26 10:30:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  great poem nice a nd raw, full of emotion. maybe make the rhyming flow a little bit more? keep it going also maybe eloborate more
| Posted on 2006-02-26 00:00:00 | by Lewiskane | [ Reply to This ]
  This was a good poem very real emotions, but it was kinda cliché but it had good flow and all that good stuff and the way u add some desciptive words it added a very good flow to it. I am really glad u are using this site to it's advantage I really hope u keep putting stuff on this site it'll help u alot in the end. you are already showing improvement keep it up Kaila

xoxoxoxo
=Logan=
| Posted on 2006-03-03 00:00:00 | by in_my_suffering | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?		7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



92918

EliteSkills

  Roleplay
  Top News