[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Why Do We Live Like Prisoners?dots

    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 36
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 730
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 240

       I'm struggling to write lately, so bear with me.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhy Do We Live Like Prisoners?dots

    Why do we live like prisoners?
    There's a whole world out there.
    I need some color
    instead of these white walls.
    I'd like to see if
    there's anything out there
    to match your blue eyes.

    Submitted on 2004-05-02 13:47:12     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I like the concept of the writing.. To find something to even compare to the beauty in your love's blue eyes. *sigh. That is so nice. Yes, it is a big wide world. I think we remain prisoner's because we lack enough money to live as we really would like. But, the rich are also enprisoned in their own traps. I would never want to be rich and famous. Imagine not even being able to walk down the street or go to a store. That would be a constant gulag life.
    | Posted on 2004-05-04 00:00:00 | by angela~ | [ Reply to This ]
      I love the title....and a good question..Why do we live like prisoners when there is so much of life to see....? I think this could have been longer more involved....Nice start...Desi...
    | Posted on 2004-05-02 00:00:00 | by Desi | [ Reply to This ]
      i can relate to wanting to see more than just the four walls, but how sometimes it's so hard to just get up and move out of the depression or the lethargy. i think you could add more to this. maybe to expound more on the colors you could see, 'cause i liked the ending with the blue eyes... keep it up!!
    | Posted on 2004-05-02 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      GOBALATA is funny. What really suck about your poem is that you didn't answer it, I've been looking for the answer to this poem for a long time. Does romantic companionship just plain make people lazy or what? Well, I'm going to China next week, but you can't come with me and my eyes are dark brown.
    | Posted on 2004-05-02 00:00:00 | by Black Rock Tractor | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting piece, and I feel like this after a convention or a particularly good weekend... its like i come crashing down and all the pretty colours are suddenly gone, and it seems very hard to find them again for a while.... nicely done, as per usual hon :)
    | Posted on 2004-05-02 00:00:00 | by Transcendancing | [ Reply to This ]
      Well, you nidely boxed that one. What I'd like to know if there's a red ribbon around the blue box. A box has six sides, your poem has seven lines. I suggest you shorten or lengthen it (sly grin).
    | Posted on 2004-05-02 00:00:00 | by Lelik | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    untitled written by Outlaw
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]