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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Lonelydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: strike three
    ASL Info:    26/m/ethiopia
    Elite Ratio:    3.07 - 32/39/18
    Words: 78
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 157
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 479



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLonelydots
    -------------------------------------------


    Is love so hard to find I say
    Is it in favor of the flavorful?
    Does the other have a chance this day
    To embrace that delicate meaningful.
    Can the perfection move aside today
    And see what really is beautiful
    Can the actor take leave today
    And reveal the slight but truthful
    Can the magic be alive at play
    If passions agony is brimming full
    Can you find love today
    If love is not inside you fool!




    Submitted on 2006-03-01 08:38:58     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Hahahaha, superb ending. "...you fool!" Hehehehe, nice one. But do you not think that it would be better to change the third line to
    "Do the others have a chance this day"? And consider punctuating a bit more.
    These are just opinions I think would make your writing better.
    | Posted on 2006-03-02 00:00:00 | by Saaber | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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