Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

A moment in time


Author: stormkrow
ASL Info:    24/ male / Montello Wi
Elite Ratio:    2.59 - 51 /52 /39
Words: 385
Class/Type: Poetry /Passion
Total Views: 1406
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1819



Description:


These are poems that me and jon both wrote toghether and I had to filanly except that he waz gone before i put them on here
Jon wrote Angle of Music for me and
I wrote Promise me while listening to Phantom of the opera sound track so alot of wrods came from there
hope that you read these as an offering of my soul and of
my signifing that Jon is gone and I can't do anything about it DAM IT ALL ANY HOW I would sell my soul to have Jon back here with me right now.
sorry this is so long it turnned into a journal instead of a description
ttul
storm


A moment in time



A moment in time a poetry story by stromkrow

A moment in time worth remmbering is my
First kiss with Jon
My last kiss with Jon
watching Jon leave
singing with Jon and his family for a concert
Jon calling me and asking me if i wanted to come up for the summer and Jon calling me his Angel of Music for the first time
Angel of Music
Your voice is like an angel
you are my angel
sing for me my angel of music
don't be afraid to show every one your talent little one
Let your vioce take you were I can not
I miss you my angel of music
I miss the way your songs put me to sleep
I miss the way your lips felt against my forehead as I fell asleep
I hope you have good melodys now and forever
Promise me that you'll share you talent with me forever
Promise me you'll try
Let me be your light with you right beside me
In a world of everlasting night
Love me that is all I ask of you
Any were you go I will go to
I gave you your music to make yor song take flight
and this is how you repay me
deny me
and betray me
He waz bound to love you when he heard you sing
Now I wish that i had never given you my music
But what can I say
Nothing lasts forever
I love you
but I will let you go if needs be
Take wing my angel and fly
But Promise me you'll rembember me and the good times
Rembember me in the times you are board
Angel your hands are cold
your face is as white as a ghost
What are you afraid of my Angel
so fair
and so
tender




Submitted on 2006-03-01 12:32:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  This is a neat way of writing a story/poem. The first thing it reminded me of was Phantom of the Opera. The use of wording and the flow presented me that image. This is a beautiful yet painful story. I like it.
| Posted on 2006-03-01 00:00:00 | by Autum-Moon | [ Reply to This ]
  ohhhh..so sad...to me...
i liked this so much so
"First kiss with Jon
My last kiss with Jon
watching Jon leave"
This is your best piece by far..so full of emotion
i hope to see more of this work from you
Swanne
| Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by Swanne | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



93306