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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: These flowersdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: strike three
    ASL Info:    26/m/ethiopia
    Elite Ratio:    3.07 - 32/39/18
    Words: 114
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 182
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 667



    Description:
       i was what u call love sick... lol... was in a different city from this girl that would make everything else but getting her unimportant... had to do something to tell her how i felt so i had some flowers ordered to her along with this poem.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThese flowersdots
    -------------------------------------------


    If these flowers were more beautiful than you.
    If these petals softer than the touch of your skin.
    These flowers that have darkened the finest few,
    Is the best of the lot only meant for a queen.
    If these flowers knew the flame in your eyes.
    If its fragrance dare smell the scent of your hair.
    Without doubt, in envy it’d wither and die
    So it lives in its dream and would not dare.
    If these flowers could see you smile.
    And be drunk in magic by your side.
    Only then would it know the truth,
    That if it were more beautiful than you
    I would have never sent these flowers to you.




    Submitted on 2006-03-01 21:23:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      So was this lady completely blown away?! Had to be. : ) very beautifully written and was drawn into the poem from the beginning till end. you pull it together well. I'm looking forward to reading your others. : )

    Candale-Switch
    | Posted on 2006-03-02 00:00:00 | by Candale-Switch | [ Reply to This ]
      so did the girl ask to marry you? cause I totally would have if you had been this sweet and considerate with me...as for the poem I loved it...it was pretty and the tone made you feel sorta drunk off the sweet fragrance of your words. I think that you did a swell job!

    Peace
    Jazmine Mystique Swaim
    | Posted on 2006-03-02 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      Very COMPLEX piece of writing. I had to read it to to three times to understand it. Maybe it's because I didn't sleep all night long...
    So what happened later? Please let me know!
    | Posted on 2006-03-02 00:00:00 | by Saaber | [ Reply to This ]
      i liked this one.you can feel the emotion you put into it.nice pictures it produced.anyway i think the last two lines were my favorite.keep up the good work.
    | Posted on 2006-03-01 00:00:00 | by LostInYerTears | [ Reply to This ]
      it is so pretty ... and sweet ... I started to tear up ... just a little though. Very beautiful poem. The last two lines were my faveorite. Great write.
    | Posted on 2006-03-02 00:00:00 | by Psychohenry32 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is beautiful. A lot of people just see flowers as a sappy token of sentiments that are going to wither and die in a few days. You took one of nature's most beautiful creations, and made it a gorgeous ode to someone that you must love very much. I think this is just wonderful. You did a fantastic job
    | Posted on 2006-03-09 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]



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