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    dots Submission Name: Five Shades of Medots

    Author: obscureskies
    ASL Info:    19/F/Fredericton NB
    Elite Ratio:    2.34 - 11/17/15
    Words: 190
    Class/Type: Poetry/Broken
    Total Views: 1017
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1297


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFive Shades of Medots

    This cold, sharp blade inside my heart
    Always seems to slice so deep
    Time’s sutures are a temporary shield
    In time, all things will be revealed
    And sutures always tend to weep
    Trickling down a crimson stream…

    sterility is a shallow pool
    Coloured white; virginity’s hue
    Never let your face be felt
    Identities just seem to melt
    And order goes askew
    Lift the lacy veil and reveal the lie…

    Lie upon the unmade bed
    It’s yours to lie in at day’s end
    Rainfall pelts the window pane
    Like daggers full of Novocaine
    And helps your weary soul to mend
    Eyes wide open in the darkness…

    Dark as night when starlight shines
    Twinkling diamonds reach the earth
    They transcend, transpose, and transfer
    Bring gold, frankincense and myrrh
    And rejoice upon the birth
    Of new life in my flaccid soul…

    Day has dawned and dried the rain
    Dreams hang like clouds in summer skies
    The blade once buried in my breast
    Has now been buried in a chest
    Placed in soil, blessed, and said goodbyes
    I am ready to belong to me.

    Submitted on 2006-03-01 21:41:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      That was rather thrilling. The one word intro to each section being able to tie in with the previous ending. Imagery sharp, yet fuzzy. I know a lot of people that would mess up a poem like that. Taking the easy rhyme path. I liked the words you chose. Lovely
    | Posted on 2006-03-01 00:00:00 | by Mr_Eff | [ Reply to This ]
      My goodness. I went on a ride with this one. Absolutely fantastic and incredible. I loved the stunning descriptive wording, and the way that you started each stanza with one word. It was exceptionally done and I have to tell you that I haven't read anything this tantalizing in a long time. Brilliant work, my dear. Keep it up; I'll be looking forward to the rest of your seducing writes. ^_^

    | Posted on 2006-03-01 00:00:00 | by Raging Rain | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem makes me feel alive and beautiful, I thank you for sharing a piece of your soul with myself and others. Continue on with your words, you inspire people you don't even know. <3
    | Posted on 2006-03-01 00:00:00 | by CaptainRogers | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh You... I never knew you had this talent inside you. You can write just as beautifuly as you can smile. This represents what true emotion is, I honestly had a tear in my eye when I was done. (dont tell anyone). If this is just the start of your postings then I can not wait to see more. You can move feelings inside people, you paint as you write and I can just feel the words. I hope everyone reads this, you must if you want to see something beautiful and stirring, Great job Hun!
    | Posted on 2006-03-02 00:00:00 | by Phobos | [ Reply to This ]

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