Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Reciprocationdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Daokao
    Elite Ratio:    6.4 - 67/37/10
    Words: 125
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1080
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 863



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsReciprocationdots
    -------------------------------------------


    With life’s first breath of air,
    fragile beings are we;
    for every two steps forward,
    we trip and fall back three.

    If only we would understand,
    a law at our right-hand;
    it goes by the name of reciprocate,
    based on give instead of take.

    This canon reverts to the beginning,
    an axiomatic taught by all faiths;
    which states to give value to others,
    expecting no return in its place.

    Reciprocation is an epiphany universal,
    an experience that touches the heart;
    when offered a true hand of kindness
    response with rife gratitude as an art.

    Seize this fundamental truth my friend,
    when put into action you will find;
    life’s little setbacks will disappear,
    replaced by prolific treasures of kind.




    Submitted on 2006-03-04 13:07:09     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      And I can learn from you I am sure. But didn't the frog make three leaps up the wall of the well and fell back two?

    This is a very nice piece, teaching something serious and important through poetry.

    does your wife write too?

    Donn
    | Posted on 2006-04-11 00:00:00 | by D McDaniel | [ Reply to This ]
      I would say that this poem contains some truth. But I am a very strong supporter of "Humanity will lead to its own destruction". So... nah! :)

    Also, you "glued" here the idea of partnership and friendship. The language is of high quality (wish I had that) and I can't find any mistakes. It happens rarely but you wrote something above (much above) the site's average. I hope I will see some more of your work in the future.

    WriterX
    | Posted on 2006-03-04 00:00:00 | by WriterX | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    93744

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry