wow. kaila leaves u long comments even though they barely ever relate the poem. but i'll leave that alone for now. this one was good...but weird. u don't know why u wanna cry but u feel the need to let out all of ur anguish in some mad rush of adrenaline. yeah. that confused me. all the hurricane references kinda got me cuz with the whole Katrina thing....yeah buddy
Luvy This is an excellent write I believe you are referring to the pain you have been thru in life and to your eyes there seems no end to this pain in sight I hope you can find the positive to the negatives you have been thru Once you are able to find the positive you are free from the negative Trust Me Ive lived thru sheer hell and now I can feel negativity and stay away from it I have never felt happier in life Remain Positive There is a light at the end of the tunnel God Bless Ron
luvy, Good job. It seemed alittle short and almost void I would love to see you add alittle more to this and bring it more to life. It was good but missing something I am not sure what but something. Good luck Angie
hey gena! how is my beautiful gena?! i dont noe if i told u or not i cant remember BUT I REALLY LOVE UR HAIR! see now u outbraided me! im sad now! anyway! i think this was more of a journal venting write! there really wasnt a flow u just kinda told everybody wat happened a lil to quickly! try to slow it down and gradually find solutions on y u feel this way! other than that it was good! I LOVE U! and u shoudnt feel all sad at wat not bcz KAILA LOVES U! ALWAYS! so suck it up and give usher a kiss when ur feelin down and try to hold on till I CAN GIVE U A HUG! hehe! weeeeeeeee! wow! im gonna look high at school today im so tired! watch troy say something like "thats cuz kailas a druggie and alwayz smokin or some nonsense" ok bye gena! i will see u in excatly 45 minutes! ~akaila~
This is classified as miscellaneous, so I can dig it.
The structure is terrible, but I didn't come away thinking this was supposed to be a well-written, thought out, overly revised masterpiece as much as it is just frustration being put to words...
That said, I really like it. I'm just looking at the idea and the feeling behind it, because that's all that should be looked at.
I know there are definitely way too many times in my life when I just get caught up in living as an average joe, and I want more. I find myself feeling empty, and wanting to feel like crap and give myselfs reason to desire for more.