Life Through My Eyes by lostpoet25

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Submission Name: Life Through My Eyes dots

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Author:	lostpoet25
ASL Info:	25/m/Illinois
Elite Ratio:	4.01 - 36/36/8
Words:	39

Class/Type:	Poetry/Dark
Total Views:	149
Average Vote:	5.0000
Bytes:	341

Description:
This is actually one of the first poems I ever wrote. Wrote it at the tender age of 14. Let me know what you think.

Life Through My Eyes dots

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Tainted visions
abandoned at conception.
Deceptive messages
clarified in death.
Forgotten truths
etched within the psyche.
All no more than obscure images
filtered through reality.
Distorted, warped,
never truly complete,
just a mass of illusions
forged by chaos.

Submitted on 2006-03-14 21:18:33 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  Impressed is the word I will use for this captavating poem. A 14 yr old boy writes "Forgotten truths
etched within" Beautiful poetry. `always write poety, Cheryl.
| Posted on 2006-03-27 00:00:00 | by ladyngold | [ Reply to This ]
  No, i don't think you should change it. When i change a poem of mine is either because i didn't finish it, or i think it seems lifeless, but most of the time it is because i run out of time and didn't finish. Well, if you want to change your poem, it's up to you. Seriously, i don't think you should change it, i like it the way it is.

~*~katara~*~
| Posted on 2006-03-16 00:00:00 | by daughterofdeath | [ Reply to This ]
  I liked this...it made me think of poems that I wrote at that age, although mine were more about my own personal mental and emotional sagas rather than such an esoteric theme. I wouldn't change a thing. It's vague enough that it works for varying interpretations...
| Posted on 2006-03-15 00:00:00 | by Emerging Soul | [ Reply to This ]
  So short with so much meaning in it. Wow, you wrote that at 14. I think you could make ot longer and add more detail to it. It does show a lot of talent for a 14 yearold though. At a young age, you saw how death could show you where life could go, that death may not be a bad thing in some cases. i think you have a good point, life is complicated and death could help you understand things you couldn't when you were alive.

~*~katara~*~
| Posted on 2006-03-15 00:00:00 | by daughterofdeath | [ Reply to This ]
  pretty profound for fourteen. It's good. it could be a bit more specific but it has a definite message. the world is full of illusions. nothing is what it seems most of the time. and death might be the only thing that brings real clarification of what life is for. I'd say you were ahead of your time. nice work.
| Posted on 2006-03-14 00:00:00 | by sierramuse8 | [ Reply to This ]

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