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    dots Submission Name: Twilight Phantasmdots

    Author: krs3332003
    Elite Ratio:    6.47 - 144/114/63
    Words: 120
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 934
    Average Vote:    3.0000
    Bytes: 879

       These are the moments just before your eyes open after a dream...you're almost awake, but still asleep. Reality and dreams battle to be the victor...

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTwilight Phantasmdots

    Alone in the dark
    To care with thoughts

    The seamless wonders of blissful slumber

    Entirely random these fluttering swells
    The crimson wizard's magical spell

    To wander these halls of temptuous echo
    A world of tomorrow never knows

    An undeniable source of ponderous demise

    some counted
    some carried
    some let go

    The rising tide of endless tears
    Fact or Fiction?
    Truth or Dare?

    Count their numbers and set them free
    Timeless endeavors of broken sanity

    A field of mirrors from self-reflection
    The ethereal touch of divine intervention

    Alone in the dark, together with thoughts

    the crescendo
    the lights

    Eyes beckon open, sweet moments end
    Forever no more until again

    Submitted on 2006-03-17 06:08:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      The poem was truly original, and that is why I enjoyed it. The brooding tone you seem to have created was perfect for your theme. The format, lo! That was an original one.

    This stanza:

    some counted
    some carried
    some let go

    was very effective. Its brevity made it "shine", and emphasised its importance.

    The diction is also accurate with perfect use of words to convey meaning. Well done!

    The poem was just great. Bravo!
    | Posted on 2006-03-17 00:00:00 | by HansRik | [ Reply to This ]
      There is a thin line between dreams and reality. Dreams are after all wishes that our hearts desires. Whenever I am alone I think. I enjoy these moments of solitude because they allow me to analyze my life. There are moments though when the solitude tortures me because the pain is too much. I really enjoyed your poem. What you speak of is very true. What is fact and what is fiction? How can you tell the difference? There are times when I feel that I am daydreaming. I like to escape into my dreams because they are an escape from reality but sometimes reality haunts me even in my dreams. Great poem.
    | Posted on 2006-03-17 00:00:00 | by Katrinagolden | [ Reply to This ]

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