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Letting Go


Author: Archer
ASL Info:    17/female/Oregon
Elite Ratio:    4.82 - 118 /148 /53
Words: 80
Class/Type: Poetry /Serious
Total Views: 1058
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 471



Description:




Letting Go



Don't hide your tears,
I see you when you cry.
You've lied throughout the years,
And you never said goodbye.

I held it in too you know,
Letting the world see my mask.
Holding my pain in afraid to let go,
And every time I'd lie when you ask.

I'm tired of fighting,
Of feeling this pain.
So I'm trying to this healing,
So I can live my life again.




Submitted on 2006-03-19 01:42:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  ahh i think the length is perfect...it doesn't need to be a novel to get the point or emotion across...i actually really liked everything about this...all 80 words...i like it so much that i'm going to send this to a friend who's feeling exactly just what you wrote...
nice job
| Posted on 2006-03-19 00:00:00 | by MmR | [ Reply to This ]
  I've felt this many, many times, and sadly, it doesn't get any easier. I like what you've got here so far, but I agree with ThisIsReal. You have so much room for expansion, but in 80 words, 3 stanzas, you did a good job. I just think that you can definitely add a lot more to this, but if you decide to keep it like this, that's fine too. But don't be afraid to explore and play around with it; in the end you might end up surprising yourself. ...bb...

XoXo
~Tayla~
| Posted on 2006-03-19 00:00:00 | by Phoenix2004 | [ Reply to This ]
  This is pretty good. Your structure is good, I see no typos, I actually ave only one thing to critisize here. 80 words??? You could easily double or tripple the length of this just going over what you already have.
| Posted on 2006-03-19 00:00:00 | by ThisIsReal | [ Reply to This ]


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