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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I Still Rememberdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Roberto Santos
    ASL Info:    18/Male/India
    Elite Ratio:    2.96 - 118/159/75
    Words: 68
    Class/Type: Poetry/You left me
    Total Views: 915
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 414



    Description:
       This is a translation of a poem I wrote in Bengali.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI Still Rememberdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I still remember the day
    When we were with each other
    The day before you left me
    The last time we were together.

    I remember very clearly
    That rainy August afternoon
    When I sang of our love
    In so many a melody and tune.

    I canít help thinking
    Of where you are this day
    I have not been at peace
    Since you went away.




    Submitted on 2006-03-19 11:00:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like the poem; however, I might change the ending to sound more concluded.

    "I have not been at peace
    Since you went away
    I can't help thinking
    Of where you are this day."

    Maybe?
    | Posted on 2006-03-28 00:00:00 | by StephE | [ Reply to This ]
      I love how the poem just flows right off the tongue. sad, but that's love! you know what you're talking about. do you still know the girl, if not, you should find her. Things may still work-out. unless im reading to deep into this, idk. this could just be a poem about nothing (i hope its not). anyway, peace
    | Posted on 2006-03-19 00:00:00 | by Black Eyes | [ Reply to This ]
      Great short, sweet poem. A bit sad, when you think of someone leaving that you love so much. I really like the second stanza, it kind of gives the poem the feeling of...well august and love mixed together. Pretty good flow. Nice job
    inkpen
    | Posted on 2006-03-19 00:00:00 | by inkpen | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like this poem short an very sweet it kind of leaves the heart wantin more of what u remember an what you will come to remember good write :) dd
    | Posted on 2006-03-19 00:00:00 | by Darcey D | [ Reply to This ]
      awww this is sweet and sad!! havin someone leave u someone that u love a lot cuz hurt!! these were my favorite lines!

    "I canít help thinking
    Of where you are this day
    I have not been at peace
    Since you went away."

    good job!
    ~akaila~
    | Posted on 2006-04-14 00:00:00 | by iluvpoetry_1 | [ Reply to This ]


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    95525

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