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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Hopedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: keestu
    ASL Info:    32/male/Sydney
    Elite Ratio:    5.61 - 153/95/116
    Words: 93
    Class/Type: Poetry/What is
    Total Views: 1169
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 549



    Description:
       All that life is about ---Hope.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHopedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Hope have I till the sun that glows,
    Live the stars that end at last.
    Eternal shall be my words in gold,
    My thought my energy the power unfurled.

    History shall I be or make one self,
    The tears that flow the rain that blows.
    Space is my life with thoughts as such,
    Hollow as it is that the world that shows.

    Warriors shall die shall live forever,
    So shall be love for life to cease.
    Make the future of history to begin,
    Hope that we all for nature in peace.




    Submitted on 2006-03-22 03:07:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I agree that the rythem needs some work, but the idea behind it is really facinating. If hope is what life is all about, why don' more people possess it and hold onto it when it is fading away? Just a thought question... Keep working with it, I believe it will come around.
    | Posted on 2006-03-22 00:00:00 | by orange | [ Reply to This ]
      this is really cool,but the rythem is kinda off,as someone already said,and i think that you could probably continue this and make it a little bit clearer so that it easer to understand becuse it rambles a bit.good overall,just needs somework.

    Keep it real,
    Faith
    | Posted on 2006-03-22 00:00:00 | by Texan_Poet | [ Reply to This ]
      i realy like it maybe the rythm and rhyming arnt so much as out but it doesnt fit properly kinda.. i dunno it might just be me but i liked it heaps.
    | Posted on 2006-03-22 00:00:00 | by unnatainable | [ Reply to This ]


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