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    dots Submission Name: Inadequacy of Selfdots

    Author: BreakAndFall
    ASL Info:    18/f/mo
    Elite Ratio:    3.34 - 115/153/59
    Words: 102
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 815
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 627

       I wrote this while on retreat, realizing I can't give up my attachment to my problems, I can't surrender them and trust that God will take care of them.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsInadequacy of Selfdots

    I kneel before you, lips touching floor
    Liquid drops of pain spill over, cheeks scarred
    Hands raised, help over my head, trembling
    Cupped within these hands is my bleeding heart
    See what life has given me, see the wounds?
    And to think that I held it all from you!
    But today, I fall before you, my love
    Give in to what I always knew was right
    I've brought you all my tears, all my life's blood
    I'll leave them at your feet; please hear my cries
    I'll walk away and leave them all behind
    This, my love,
    Is my final sacrifice.

    Submitted on 2006-03-28 09:39:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      The pouring out of self is the necessary step to allow God to fill you with His holiness and pure love. Your poem told a powerful story of the conflicted spirit within the human nature, which contends with God and clings to the selfish desires of this world.

    A wonderful poem.

    (One spelling fix: line 10 "feel" should be "feet."

    Great work!
    | Posted on 2006-03-28 00:00:00 | by The Gadfly | [ Reply to This ]
      This could be so many things. One could see it as an ode to God, which is what I believe you intended it to be, or you could go the other way, and see it as a person that is finally learning to love and trust in someone other than themselves. Regardless, it is beautiful, and intense, and poignant, and you paint a strong image of a broken person kneeling at the feet of her true love, whether it be flesh or spiritual... Wonderful job!
    | Posted on 2006-03-28 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      Another interesting piece, I like that in a sense its like a little prayer.

    Sometimes we are faced with problems to which we have no solution or way to get out.
    It is then that we leave it all up to God and His infinite wisdom and mercy.Thanks for that little reminder.

    Keep up the good work and have a blessed day and wonderful day. This was a nice little read and write.
    | Posted on 2006-03-28 00:00:00 | by Departed One | [ Reply to This ]

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