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    dots Submission Name: The shadowdots

    Author: demolitionlover
    ASL Info:    18/F/MI
    Elite Ratio:    2.1 - 12/31/23
    Words: 84
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 724
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 555

       A poem about a long-lost friend

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe shadowdots

    Helplessly, I stood alone
    And watched her try to drown her sorrows
    Bottle after bottle,
    Until the pain finally lifted.
    The ground was cold, and the sky black
    The night I mourned her shadow
    As she lay still on the floor.
    Time was everlasting
    The day awoke, shaded with regret.
    Death moves in full-speed
    Leaving no time for the living.
    As life parted from her flesh,
    Sunlight touched her face.
    One last spark to be seen in her eyes,
    Then night stole her away.

    Submitted on 2006-03-30 18:29:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      i can really relate to this piece but i dont know if its the same way. i do like some of the imagery and whatnot, it was simple and got to the point, and i dont think it needed much to get there.
    keep writing,

    | Posted on 2006-09-17 00:00:00 | by BleedingTears | [ Reply to This ]
      interesting piece. It has good everything; ( deff., feeling, structure...), but I'm unsure as to who or how it portrays. Are you watching this happen to someone or is it a vision of yourself?? Idk. well, good write. keep it up.
    | Posted on 2006-03-30 00:00:00 | by night_angel | [ Reply to This ]

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