My emotions pile up;
your emotions do the same.
We collide and break down,
but we don't need anyone
to clear away our wreckage;
we can do it ourselves,
and we embrace
carefully avoiding the jagged edges.
This seems very real to me. A good analogy of serious relationship on any level where we have to compromise and avoid stepping on each other's toes. I also like the points of contrast you create (up/down, anyone/ourselves, avoid/embrace). Nicely spaced, just lacks some background music.
I have to write a comment to keep myself over 100%. So I'm using this piece to do that. Its a fine piece, but not near so full of great pictures as your best stuff. I'm a completely unemotional and undepressed person myself, which doesn't help me to connect here. I hate when I post something bad but everyone likes it more than my best stuff, which keeps happening. This whole format is burning an iron in my temple. I just posted two jokes that I wrote in two minutes and they got more positive comments than the stuff I slaved over.
GOOD IN IT'S SHORTNESS BUT I THINK IT'S TO GOOD OF A CONCEPT TO BE LEFT WHERE IT IS,oops caps lock and i'm too lazy to re write any ways, i think you should make somthing going into a little more depth. but still great as it is.i like how you switch up the meaning of wreckage from a metaphor to a literal sense.
cute, nice and short, just how I adore your work. hehe. I like how you are not complaining, like in some poems like this, people complain that their emotions pile up, and they cannot deal, but you can, and you clear them by yourself, nice work
well said, in this piece, well said. i like how you can accomplish so much in so few words (i must agree that you do appear to have a knack for it). this is right to the point, and i enjoyed it. -dandan
I liked this one alot more than the other one. It seems short poems are your thing and you seem good at it. I really liked the part about avoiding the jagged edges, hard to do that sometimes isn't it? Anyway, good job.
Emotional Wreck Like walking barefoot on the beach, avoid the shards and jagged fragments of glass--until the winds of time, and sea of love have prevailed to polish smooth the edges. Amy, your recent work is markedly deep and ever so accurate at hitting the mark. Silver