Two Thirty-Five -------------------------------------------
Waiting for the pills to take effect
I wander up and down these halls again
Socked feet pad up and down stairs
Pacing in time to the hands on the clock
Etching numbers into my brain
One o’clock two o’clock two thirty-five
When did this train derail?
When was it that I lost control?
The tracks became slick and warped
My wheels no longer fit the treads
The panoramic view converged into black
One pixel at a time, as not to mislead
For really, we choose the paths we walk
The choice is ours when we
Lay me down to sleep at night
And wake up slowly in the morning
We all want anything other than
What lies upon us; we crave to know
What lies above and beyond us
this is real lame but i'm gonna say it anyway i can't telly ou how many times i've felt like that just wandering around in that tired [censored]ed up state of mind
the writing is done well. You payed close attention to the details of the setting... something i always look for when im reading the poetry on here, not to many people do it though. iw ould just be a little more specific tot he setting the beginning few lines maybe describe whether your in a house or whereever you are so the reader has an easier way to picture whats going on
"Waiting for the pills to take effect I wander up and down these halls again"
This is my favorite part of this poem. I feel like that when I take caffeine pills/LoL.
The last part about us being able to choose our own paths, that's really inspiring. And wanting what we don't have, or trying to find out the future while neglecting the here and now, I love that. It sounds like you put so much thought into this piece, or you just have natural talent. I love that in your poetry, they all teach something.
Although I gotta admit, the title was what really drew me to this piece. I wanted to know how on earth someone could make a poem titled that, but you wrote an amazing one.