[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Couldn't Really Saydots

    Author: precious_poetry
    ASL Info:    19 F TN
    Elite Ratio:    3.17 - 137/145/67
    Words: 257
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 597
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1532

       I did actually have a dream just like this one. Except I remembered it. Another difference, in my dream, I saw myself and tried to go hold the other me, but every step I took only set me farther back from the me I had found. Confusing? You bet. Can't really make out if it were to mean something... but I wrote about it anyway.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCouldn't Really Saydots

    Lost in a house, old and creepy
    I am searching for something unknown
    I go room to room looking around
    Found nothing or no one, I am still alone

    The house is large and has many rooms,
    This place is cold and barely lit
    The first floor searched and bare
    As dark as an abandoned pit

    My thoughts are few and far between
    As I take the stairs to the next floor.
    I can't figure out what I am looking for
    Hallway reveals more doors.

    Why am I here? What do I seek?
    My thoughts begin to race
    The thing I want, desire, need
    Will I find it in this place?

    In the last room, at the end of the hall
    In the corner, I see someone, holding theirself tight
    The face looks up and tears fall off
    I freeze in shock of the sight.

    Its me, myself, and I in that corner
    Lost, scared, and crying
    Finally found myself, in this place
    After so many years of trying

    I see the sun rise at the window
    But shadows take over the room
    I turn and run down the hall
    Leaving the other me with the gloom

    I wake up, alone in my bed
    To the sound of the alarm beeping
    Trying hard to remember what it was
    I was seeing while I was sleeping.

    The memory of the dream was gone
    And I go to start my day
    Feeling like I was missing something
    But couldn't really say

    Submitted on 2006-04-02 23:14:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      i like the comparison to a house. and searching through the house that is your soul. different rooms and whatnot.

    i agree with sandman.
    good write.
    | Posted on 2006-04-03 00:00:00 | by narcolepsy | [ Reply to This ]
      this was very good and as you say its about a dream alot of good stories come from dreams wether they are thought about when were sleeping or traveling day to day its all good just like yors

    great read

    | Posted on 2006-04-03 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]
      dreams are a great place to get inspiration right? I liked the theme of finding yourself without knowing what you are looking for.
    | Posted on 2006-04-03 00:00:00 | by mimi | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Push written by JanePlane
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    4th of July written by layDsayD
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Bond written by saartha
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Wavelength written by saartha




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]