Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

The Funeral

Author: don14120
ASL Info:    18/Male/Space
Elite Ratio:    2.25 - 5 /9 /7
Words: 1172
Class/Type: Story /Religious
Total Views: 1002
Average Vote:    5.0000
Bytes: 6057


This is cooool

The Funeral

The gates opened at noon, but the line was close to a quarter mile long at eleven thirty. Laughter was heard in every conversation. Adults talked vividly about the proceeding that would go on later that day and the children played their wild games of pretend suicide. They jumped in the air as high as their feet would take them, and then fell flat onto their sides, as if they had fallen thousands of feet to their death.

The event was to take place at two. When the gates flew open, the vivid conversations ceased and the parents picked up their dead children and hurried in to get the best view possible. The best view was obviously at the edge, as close to the center as possible. At the edge one could see the deep canyon’s dark red stone walls blending into the shallow blue stream at the bottom. There was a bank on either side of the stream piled with rocks. The bottom of the canyon was a quarter mile down from the viewpoint of the spectators. After all the spectators were content with their positions for the event, the vivid conversations started up again and the children went back to their games.

It was two o’clock. A man walked through the gates. Behind him four men supported a coffin. A priest walked in behind the others. The crowd went completely silent. The vivid conversations died and the dead children stood motionlessly waiting for the man to speak. The man broke the silence. “Today,” he said, “I give you Jesse Christopher!” The coffin was opened and a naked man stepped out. The crowd went insane. Parents and children alike screamed at the top of their lungs for Jesse Christopher. The band struck up a happy tune and everybody began to dance. Well, everybody except for Jesse. He watched in amusement at all the people who came to see him. Jesse took a step forward, and everybody stopped. The music stopped. The dancing stopped.

Jesse spoke. “Please,” he said. As if he had spoken a touching speech, the sea of people parted directly down the middle. Jesse looked ahead. Between him and the railing one hundred feet away there was only stone and gravel. He began to walk down the path between the walls of people. Following behind Jesse was the priest. As Jesse walked by, people patted him on the back and spoke to him words of encouragement. The children again began to play their games of fake suicide. Jesse continued walking towards the rail. To him every foot was a mile, every inch was a yard, and every breath was a lifetime. In what seemed like hours later, he arrived at the edge. He grasped the top of the rail with both of his hands and hoisted himself over. Holding onto the rail he said, “Pray for me. I will need all the prayers in the world, plus more.” The priest blessed him with the sign of the cross and walked away.

Jesse held out his arms and fell backwards. The spectators pushed towards the edge so they could view the young man’s last moments. The fall seemed extremely slow. Jesse saw the canyon walls watching his every move towards death below. He saw the birds mocking him because he could not fly. They pretended to fall like he did, but at the last second the birds spread their wings and flew away as to taunt him. He saw the river below, mocking his patience. The river had carved the canyon over hundreds of thousands of years. For the first time in his life Jesse understood the world. He did not want to die.

Jesse felt a sudden jolt halfway down the canyon. The spectators looked down in awe. Jesse had stopped in mid air. They began screaming and taunting him.

“Satan!” shouted a spectator.
“He is the devil himself!”
“Look at the way he floats there, just as Lucifer floats in the inferno of Hell!”
“This is blasphemy!”

The priest spoke. “Enough,” he said. The crowd grew silent once again. He walked to the edge and looked down. The priest was terrified when he saw Jesse floating in mid air. Jesse looked up into the priest’s eyes.

The priest spoke again. “Stone him.”

The crowd went wild. Men, women, and children alike began to throw stones off the cliff at Jesse. Most of the stones missed but enough hit him that he began to feel pain. Jesse stayed still. Stuck in mid air, he could not move.

The children went first. They had already practiced for most of the afternoon. One by one they jumped off the cliff hoping to grab a hold of Jesse and bring him to his death. None of them were able to do so. They clawed at Jesse on their way by and on rare occasions touched him. One by one, the children fell to their deaths. The parents followed suit. One by one. Few parents even came close to grabbing hold of Jesse and they all fell to the bottom of the canyon. Hundreds of people lay dead on the rocks below. Jesse looked down at them. He watched the people scream their last words, and then silence.

The priest looked down at Jesse again. “Rot in hell Satan! Rot in hell you murderer!” He tied a rope to a nearby tree and sized up the noose around his neck. He tied the other end to a branch. He ran back to the edge of the cliff and threw more stones at Jesse. He could not manage to hit him. He hurried back to the tree, got on his knees, and said a short prayer. The priest grabbed the rope and fit it snug around his own neck. With one swift movement his neck snapped and the rope snapped as well. He lay on the ground paralyzed. Nobody was left to save him. It was hell.

Jesse stayed afloat above the river, in between the canyon walls, high in the sky. He watched the river dig deeper and deeper into the rock, with more patience than anyone could ever imagine. The river had perseverance as well. Never stopping, ever, for anything. Jesse wished he could be like that. He no longer wanted to die. It was hell.

Submitted on 2006-04-03 17:45:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  This was probably the best thing I"ve read in a lot longer then I can remember, I'm not sure if I want to say EVER but it was d.amn near it! This was kewl cuz the beginning was so haunting, like you were playing with the reader a bit, catching their intrest while slowly getting them ready for the rest of the write. It was so awesome to how you mocked human nature, the need to hurt him because he wasn't percieved as normal, and the failure by those who have someone else's worst interest in mind. and then how you described the end, he was between where seconds before he thought he wanted to be and where he just a few seconds before wanted to leave, and the desire is reversed. it was a kewl semi-cliffhanger becuz in my opinion and I"m not sure of your religion but really don't have a reason to believe in god at the moment (sorry if that offended you it wasn't meant to) but from the view of a person who used to be christian (I used to be cuz my family was but I no longer am) its like jesse used to think that life was good, "heaven" was great and "hell" was aweful, and then he decided he was sick of life, wanted to head to hell and forget about heaven but it's like hanging there in midair IS life, it's the space between what he wants and what he thought he wanted. This was really thought provoking, and your imagry was kick ass. You've really got me hooked, I'm gonna have to read the rest of yours sometime soon. thought it was kinda funny that my name is jessie as well....I'm a girl but still kinda funny. anyway great stuff,
| Posted on 2006-04-28 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow..Interesting...I liked this story a was weird how the children played little games of pretend suicide...Did Jesse want to die in the beginning, like did He change his mind once he was falling slowly to his death?...well anyhows i loved your vivid description, the imagery was was like a movie playing out in my head..a cool movie i must say...weird but interesting..i hope to read more of your work..keep up the great work!!
| Posted on 2006-04-04 00:00:00 | by rainbowXrazors | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?