I would need this gun
To complete my mission
I would need this CD
So I can listen
A cell phone
To say good bye
Kleenex
For my cry
This is the sweetest suicide
A car
So I can drive
A pin and pad
To leave a note
Alcohol
To numb the pain
Weed
To fuck up my brain
Maybe coke
To thin my veins
This is the sweetest suicide
Photos
To remember the good times
A destination
To do my crime
The ocean
Because I love it
A watch
To mark the time
Farewell
Goodbye
I can't make up my mind
This is the sweetest suicide
I feel the wind blowing up my sleeves
The ocean water touching my knees
The earth is so beautiful
To bad I have to leave
The tide is high
I take a swim
Now I start counting
Down to my sin
The gun is loaded
My letters wrote
Blues are playing
I take a line of coke
Calls are made
Messages sent
I hit this weed
And take a sip
Splatter my brains
And fall into the ocean
Farewell
Goodbye.
This is the sweetest suicide
i liked it because it mixed everything i have to do with self only i even [censored] up sucide for myself, i can't die right so i enjoyed it and the drugs and the drinking in end it doesn't work for me sadly but i love the poem so yeah great write once again and i'm sorry if some of my comments are confusing i'am abit distrated and i can't spell worth a damn so yeah...-jess-
um...interesting...nice style..very unique..fast pace..it was really good....don't do drugs hun, they aren't good for you...you don't need to commit suicide you can always come talk to me..anyhows this was a really good write..hope to read more of your stuff..keep up the good work!! ^_^
wow. i dont even kno what to say. this is great. you are a VERY talanted writer. all around thsi is great. i really understand were ur coming from. ive done all the drugs tried all the ways but i guess dyeing wasnt worth it for me. i was almost there. but theres a point u realize that uve actually got something. but this is really good. and i look forward to reading more. good write.
you are a true artist and i've just fallen in love with you adn your poetry, this is so well written (besides pen is spelt pin) it's truly touching...i think of suicide often and this describes many of the things i wish i could do. plus i do drugs already so this really appeals to me. i love writting about suicide and reading about it so i don't do it and this makes me get a chill...like how i feel before during and after i cut all rolled into one...i know this sounds crazy but i hope you understand...
And fall into the ocean This is the sweetest suicide Farewell Goodbye.
Just a suggestion, but to me, this part would sound better this way:
Farewell Goodbye. I fall into the ocean This is the sweetest Suicide.
Cause it in the poem itself, if the "narrator" were reading it, the Farewell Goodbye part would be read after they had died... doesn't really flow, but other than that, its wonderful keep up the good work!
Submission Name: Sweetest suicide
