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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: He wanted moredots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: WhErEaMi
    ASL Info:    16/f/nc
    Elite Ratio:    2.95 - 35/38/24
    Words: 110
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 645
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 671



    Description:
       What are you looking for in terms of feedback? Any background information behind the piece? Hints? Is this just to vent? Emotional state while writing?


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    dotsHe wanted moredots
    -------------------------------------------


    Black and blue
    is the color of my frame
    Kicks and punches
    from my boyfriend is to blame

    Motionless on the floor
    my body lays
    Because he gave me
    another beating today

    Pain consumes my body
    Blood consumes the floor
    I can feel I'm slowly dying
    because I cant take it anymore

    I don't want to let go
    but why should I hold on
    I have no pride left
    all my self esteem is gone

    I tried to give him the world
    and all I wanted to be was his wife
    But I guess he wanted more from me
    So he took my life




    Submitted on 2006-04-06 08:40:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Aww..don't let any guy treat you like that Jessy....you should be happy and don't let guys walk all over you...you shouldn't love a guy that does that to you..get away...anyhows this piece was really good..keep up the great work!! ^_^

    --Lucy--
    | Posted on 2006-04-09 00:00:00 | by rainbowXrazors | [ Reply to This ]
      *tears* this is really sad. im sorry. i gone thru the same thing and yet i thought i loved teh guy it wasnt true. go, walk away from it. seriosly like lostspirt said, "before he does kill you". im so sorry this is soooo sad. i hope you make it and ur life gets better. by the way great write very very good.
    <3 Kelly
    | Posted on 2006-04-06 00:00:00 | by bleedinbabygrl8 | [ Reply to This ]
      i have tears in my eye honey....my mom let my dad beat her...she died now he beats me...no one deserves this and as long as you have the chioce to get away from it, take it...you can do better and anyone who says different is an insecure [censored]! great job with the rhyming and the flow...this is very touching...
    | Posted on 2006-04-06 00:00:00 | by suicidalacts72 | [ Reply to This ]
      flip this made me cry :*(
    i had a relationship with a guy and suffered a bloody good beating from him......
    im sorry.....get away, start a new life before he does kill you.......
    Seriously, no man is worth pain
    God Bless
    Lotsaluv
    Nadine
    i loved this poem........i felt it :)
    | Posted on 2006-04-06 00:00:00 | by lostspirit | [ Reply to This ]


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