Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: I (dont) Love Youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: LoveToHateMe
    ASL Info:    20/girl/Philly
    Elite Ratio:    4.61 - 175/148/42
    Words: 94
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 882
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 566



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsI (dont) Love Youdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Each time that you tell me
    The sound just tears me up
    Slowly ripping my insides
    And yet I havenít had enough
    I find hope to still hold onto.
    It cuts me like a knife.
    I let the blood flow freely
    Iím holding onto life.
    I just canít breathe without you.
    You breathe into me.
    I canít take the truth surrounding
    and Iím drowning in this sea.
    It kills me but sustains me
    So continue what you do.
    A lie has never meant as much
    as me lying next to you.





    Submitted on 2006-04-07 11:18:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i hope you don't get insulted, but i think this is cute. it made me say 'aww...' but not in a sad way.

    i like the flow from bad into good; like... ehhh... it's times like these that i wish i could explain myself properly. the beginning is all sad and negative and the end is sorta happy. for some strange reason i felt like this was happy...i know weird, right? i mean, wait, maybe not happy, no happy isn't the word, i think i'm goin' for positive. yeah, that seems right. problem sloved.

    sorry u had to read all that... my mind is a weird place and it sort of just seeped right in to this.

    "A lie has never meant as much
    as me lying next to you." = my favorite part.
    it's the part that made me say aww.

    good stuff samm.
    -Kate
    | Posted on 2006-04-12 00:00:00 | by MyFairCalamity | [ Reply to This ]
      Samm, I'm so sad.
    If I wasn't medicated, I would be crying uncontrollably.
    (Really, when I dont pop pills, I'm a loose cannon. I didnt take any yesterday, and I looked at the words "Theres ten thousand reasons to survive, but you only needed one to die" on my wall, and I cried for the next half hour. See how sensitive I can be? lol It's rediculous.)

    Anywho, back to my comment...

    "This hope that I hold on to,
    cuts my hand like a knife."

    I dont know why, but that made my hand feel all weird and tingly. I pictured the knife... and the bleeding... and it was really disturbing (but in a good way).

    "It kills me and keeps me going"

    That part reminded me of a song that says, "I like what you put me through, cause I feel almost alive." I like it. (I have a song for almost everything, and I feel compelled to share. You know how I do.)

    And my most favorite part ever is the end:
    "A lie has never meant as much
    as me lying next to you."

    How creative is that?!? I love it.
    Oooo you're good.

    The whole thing is fabulous. I agree with the last commentor who said that it's "drenched in emotion." It's gorgeous in every way.

    I am your biggest fan ever. Really. I'm like a brick house.

    ...what? I dont know what that means. lol Byee Samm

    Very beautifully done

    -nikkki
    | Posted on 2006-04-07 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]
      whoa.... this is like... drenched in emotion! it's flowing out of everyword and i'm swallowed up in it all!!!... and the message of lost love is as clear as day... it's like opening a door that leads to the bottom of the ocean. YOu don't know what lies behind it, but you open it up and it completely engulfs you... i want to see more of this out of you... Keep it up
    | Posted on 2006-04-07 00:00:00 | by diamonds_2_dust | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    98264

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Lilitu written by endlessgame23
    Suffer The Children written by poetotoe
    Vortex: The Imagination That Is written by KeeperOfLight
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The World written by jjd
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Life is moments written by Ramneet
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (1) written by endlessgame23
    Still Perfectly Flawed written by armand

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry