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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Fecal Shatterdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Ratmeat
    ASL Info:    25/M/Los Angeles
    Elite Ratio:    3.33 - 200/222/61
    Words: 75
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 430
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 513



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFecal Shatterdots
    -------------------------------------------


    drizzled with candy coated feces
    there is no energy for spell check
    when riticule is welcomed like a
    bourbon drenched blow job

    this rain packed alot of shit
    for just one day
    it's personables strewn about
    it's ugly display of couthlessness
    it should be told to leave now

    it's been much longer than
    just one day

    and the taste buds
    have long whittled their way
    past the sugar jackets




    Submitted on 2006-04-12 00:38:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i don't think it was that bad, I loved the last stanza--it made me chuckle. I have no idea what couthlessness is
    You've misspelled several words. This part, on a second reading really had me rollin:

    drizzled with candy coated fecese
    there is no energy for spell check---cause I pictured you coated in it. Keep it up_devoted
    | Posted on 2006-10-02 00:00:00 | by devoted_dozer | [ Reply to This ]
      wow................... um.............. that was horrible.

    I think you should change this line, "this rain packed alot of [censored]" to "this poem packs a lot of [censored]"
    | Posted on 2006-04-12 00:00:00 | by mrmundane | [ Reply to This ]



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