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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: It still endeddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Dead_alive
    ASL Info:    17/f/ont
    Elite Ratio:    3.46 - 11/4/3
    Words: 69
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 702
    Average Vote:    3.0000
    Bytes: 495



    Description:
       i'm emo get over my broken heart because i never will!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsIt still endeddots
    -------------------------------------------


    slipping through these fog like stages
    disspointment haunts your face
    i don't know if i can take this
    its like you've left without a trace

    worry over writes my judgement
    hatred over writes my fear
    this illusion all for nothing
    knowing why you can't be here

    it seems as though i'm falling slowly
    everything keeps fading fast
    holding onto what we had
    wondering why it didn't last




    Submitted on 2006-04-14 18:45:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
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    ||| Comments |||
      I love this poem. I don't know how I am suppose to comment on it when there is not to fix on it...so keep up the good JOb

    Angel
    | Posted on 2006-04-27 00:00:00 | by kaoriliveshere | [ Reply to This ]
      Break up or a death? I'm interested in that because it could go either way. This was a nice poem...it could use some work in ares...try breaking it up into different stanzas...it'll help to reader get the flow of it better...at least it would for me.

    Keep it up, it was pretty good!

    *Toxic*
    | Posted on 2006-04-14 00:00:00 | by Toxic_Rayne | [ Reply to This ]
      You know what, I can really relate to this right now. I hate break ups. I like that poem, but, I wanted to steal it. *just kidding*
    | Posted on 2006-04-14 00:00:00 | by darkened_soul | [ Reply to This ]
      Some things just aren't meant to last. I think, what I got at least, was that your realtionship suddenly ended. I'm sorry for that. And your poem was nice. It was slightly confusing, but other then that it was good. The imagery was there, though cleaner stanzas could have helped in the delivery. But, overall it got the point across, so...Nice poem!
    Cheers,
    ~Persephone~
    | Posted on 2006-04-14 00:00:00 | by Persephone | [ Reply to This ]
      This was really nice. Sometimes we lose what we think are the best things in life but only to find something better. (i dont know whats going to happen we find that one thing beyond which there is nothing better then i guess we're screwed, it's funny life has a way of doing that),

    Shalom,
    Jay.
    | Posted on 2006-04-15 00:00:00 | by Flowerinbloom | [ Reply to This ]


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