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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Miss you my lovedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: keestu
    ASL Info:    32/male/Sydney
    Elite Ratio:    5.61 - 153/95/116
    Words: 99
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 1055
    Average Vote:    1.0000
    Bytes: 553



    Description:
       Just a goodbye from me.....


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMiss you my lovedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Long have I waited for this moment not to come,
    Glare through the stars a moment of silence.
    Hold in air till I breathe out the truth,
    Shall not the end die buried in defiance.

    Home have I called second to all that is,
    Happiness in a drop, a sip of love.
    Hope end ends like it should,
    As sigh of relief? A moment above.

    Miss you my love in all that I say,
    Grace in life, a debt to abide.
    Candle in the dark as so it seems,
    Goodbye my love a dream in my stride.




    Submitted on 2006-04-18 22:53:32     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      I absolutely love this.
    I love your style, the lines with unexpected wording, such as “Long have I waited for this moment not to come”.
    The only line that is a little awkward is the “Hope end ends like it should”, to me it seems like you could reword this and make it flow better
    | Posted on 2006-04-20 00:00:00 | by Brandiness | [ Reply to This ]


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