[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Depressiondots

    Author: Shadows Life
    Elite Ratio:    4.4 - 127/127/27
    Words: 143
    Class/Type: Deep Thought/Depressed
    Total Views: 700
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 818

       i was kinda depressed when i wrote this soo :P

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    i am not a person anymore
    too many bitter things have cast a shade on me
    at times it hurts too much to breathe
    and pain's my only company
    i sit alone on stormy nights
    waiting for the day to come
    but suns too far away to shine
    and clouds too dense for hope to break
    i cry for help but no one's near
    and pleas fall on defeaned ears
    a world of stone a world of steel
    a world too cold and dank with fear
    no time to smile no time to laugh
    no time to rest for but a while
    glory comes to those who seek
    but if we seek whats there to find
    void of truth void of faith
    built on lies for all to see
    questions linger in the air
    confusion the state of mind
    chaos its remedy

    Submitted on 2006-04-19 12:27:58     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I liked this alot , your wording was awesome, but like Maggie mentioned try to stay happy, hehe just saying that makes me a bit of a hypocrite but there was some hope in this write which is always good. I completely loved your last line, it really brought the whole mood together, also just curious, Ron said something about a female, ur a dude right???? lol anyway great write, I'll make sure to read more from you soon.
    | Posted on 2006-04-23 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ]
      Depression is chaos and it is the process that needs to be walked through to find its remedy. The void is the truth. Interesting and amazing poem. Sad but with a gimmer of hope. Hold onto the hope.

    Depressed people are still people.

    | Posted on 2006-04-19 00:00:00 | by elephantasia | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree with kate, hang in there. I loved your wording. It gave the effect to the reader to analyze the world around us and see how depressed it can make one besides yourself. I too suffer with depression, and can relate so much to these feelings. Your flow was nice, but a little off, and your rhyming was off in a cuople of places, but any small flaws I saw was nothing that would ruin this poem. Remarkabely candid and realistic. I liked this very much.

    | Posted on 2006-04-19 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]
      This is really sad
    In this write I find a sad person who seemingley has noone who cares to help her move forward
    My Friend while I am here in chat allow me to be that friend
    I will do everything possible to show you there is a beautiful world out there just waiting for you to open your eyes to her beauty
    God Bless
    | Posted on 2006-04-20 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]