Very good. I like all the analogies you used here, it gave depicted how attached the person is to this Sophia. I liked how you made each word seem to rhyme at the end of a sentence to create a nice flow. I think that this being brief worked out just fine. Good work!
The briefness in this poem works out really well because it leaves a lot of filling in the blanks to the reader. How exactly is Sophia leaving, how long had she been there, why did she have to go, why couldn't the narrator come too? It lets the reader get involved rather actively. And that is always a good thing. This poem had no apparent rhyme scheme, at least not at first glance, but it had a certain flow to it that worked out really well. When reading this poem, I get the image in my head of all of these things taking place in a large field: one single dandelion with only one seed, as the wind tries to tear it away; a small burr sitting on a coat that had been thrown listlessly on the ground; and then Sophia. In my head I see a small child running through a field of wheat, wearing a blue sort of Easter/summer dress and running to a boat. A sail boat. And he mother is just standing there, watching her run, because she knows that Sophia has to go. It sounds like she may be dieing. But I get the picture of a mother whose daughter is growing up a lot faster then she had anticipated. Anyway...good job here.
This is really deep I really like the way you showed just how much Sophia means to you Very Well done The style you wrote this in I like a few words but definately carrying a lot of meaning Great Job Ron
aww lol i love this poem hehe it goes so well with the picture u have such sweet little images that made me think of childlike innocence especially the word usage given perhaps the word logic kinda took me by surprise seeing the image i was forming but the dandelion the burr all those words and the finale set sail sweet sofia were just images i can find no other words to describe but... sweet lol i really like this poem kinda of a gentle breather and a reminder that childhood should be celeberated great write :)