'The Suicide' by Edna St. Vincent Millay


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"Curse thee, Life, I will live with thee no more!
Thou hast mocked me, starved me, beat my body sore!
And all for a pledge that was not pledged by me,
I have kissed thy crust and eaten sparingly
That I might eat again, and met thy sneers
With deprecations, and thy blows with tears,-
Aye, from thy glutted lash, glad, crawled away,
As if spent passion were a holiday!
And now I go. Nor threat, nor easy vow
Of tardy kindness can avail thee now
With me, whence fear and faith alike are flown;
Lonely I came, and I depart alone,
And know not where nor unto whom I go;
But that thou canst not follow me I know."Thus I to Life, and ceased; but through my brain
My thought ran still, until I spake again:"Ah, but I go not as I came,-no trace
Is mine to bear away of that old grace
I brought! I have been heated in thy fires,
Bent by thy hands, fashioned to thy desires,
Thy mark is on me! I am not the same
Nor ever more shall be, as when I came.
Ashes am I of all that once I seemed.
In me all's sunk that leapt, and all that dreamed
Is wakeful for alarm,-oh, shame to thee,
For the ill change that thou hast wrought in me,
Who laugh no more nor lift my throat to sing
Ah, Life, I would have been a pleasant thing
To have about the house when I was grown
If thou hadst left my little joys alone!
I asked of thee no favor save this one:
That thou wouldst leave me playing in the sun!
And this thou didst deny, calling my name
Insistently, until I rose and came.
I saw the sun no more.-It were not well
So long on these unpleasant thoughts to dwell,
Need I arise to-morrow and renew
Again my hated tasks, but I am through
With all things save my thoughts and this one night,
So that in truth I seem already quite
Free,and remote from thee,-I feel no haste
And no reluctance to depart; I taste
Merely, with thoughtful mien, an unknown draught,
That in a little while I shall have quaffed."Thus I to Life, and ceased, and slightly smiled,
Looking at nothing; and my thin dreams filed
Before me one by one till once again
I set new words unto an old refrain:"Treasures thou hast that never have been mine!
Warm lights in many a secret chamber shine
Of thy gaunt house, and gusts of song have blown
Like blossoms out to me that sat alone!
And I have waited well for thee to show
If any share were mine,-and now I go
Nothing I leave, and if I naught attain
I shall but come into mine own again!"Thus I to Life, and ceased, and spake no more,
But turning, straightway, sought a certain door
In the rear wall. Heavy it was, and low
And dark,-a way by which none e'er would go
That other exit had, and never knock
Was heard thereat,-bearing a curious lock
Some chance had shown me fashioned faultily,
Whereof Life held content the useless key,
And great coarse hinges, thick and rough with rust,
Whose sudden voice across a silence must,
I knew, be harsh and horrible to hear,-
A strange door, ugly like a dwarf.-So near
I came I felt upon my feet the chill
Of acid wind creeping across the sill.
So stood longtime, till over me at last
Came weariness, and all things other passed
To make it room; the still night drifted deep
Like snow about me, and I longed for sleep.But, suddenly, marking the morning hour,
Bayed the deep-throated bell within the tower!
Startled, I raised my head,-and with a shout
Laid hold upon the latch,-and was without.* * * *Ah, long-forgotten, well-remembered road,Leading me back unto my old abode,My father's house! There in the night I came,And found them feasting, and all things the sameAs they had been before. A splendour hungUpon the walls, and such sweet songs were sungAs, echoing out of very long ago,Had called me from the house of Life, I know.
So fair their raiment shone I looked in shame
On the unlovely garb in which I came;
Then straightway at my hesitancy mocked:
"It is my father's house!" I said and knocked;
And the door opened. To the shining crowd
Tattered and dark I entered, like a cloud,
Seeing no face but his; to him I crept,
And "Father!" I cried, and clasped his knees, and wept.* * * *Ah, days of joy that followed! All alone
I wandered through the house. My own, my own,
My own to touch, my own to taste and smell,
All I had lacked so long and loved so well!
None shook me out of sleep, nor hushed my song,
Nor called me in from the sunlight all day long.I know not when the wonder came to me
Of what my father's business might be,
And whither fared and on what errands bent
The tall and gracious messengers he sent.
Yet one day with no song from dawn till night
Wondering, I sat, and watched them out of sight.
And the next day I called; and on the third
Asked them if I might go,-but no one heard.
Then, sick with longing, I arose at last
And went unto my father,-in that vast
Chamber wherein he for so many years
Has sat, surrounded by his charts and spheres.
"Father," I said, "Father, I cannot play
The harp that thou didst give me, and all day
I sit in idleness, while to and fro
About me thy serene, grave servants go;
And I am weary of my lonely ease.
Better a perilous journey overseas
Away from thee, than this, the life I lead,
To sit all day in the sunshine like a weed
That grows to naught,-I love thee more than they
Who serve thee most; yet serve thee in no way.
Father, I beg of thee a little task
To dignify my days,-'tis all I ask
Forever, but forever, this denied,
I perish.""Child," my father's voice replied,
"All things thy fancy hath desired of me
Thou hast received. I have prepared for thee
Within my house a spacious chamber, where
Are delicate things to handle and to wear,
And all these things are thine. Dost thou love song?
My minstrels shall attend thee all day long.
Or sigh for flowers? My fairest gardens stand
Open as fields to thee on every hand.
And all thy days this word shall hold the same:
No pleasure shalt thou lack that thou shalt name.
But as for tasks-" he smiled, and shook his head;
"Thou hadst thy task, and laidst it by," he said.

Editor 1 Interpretation

The Suicide by Edna St. Vincent Millay

Have you ever been so overwhelmed by the weight of the world that you just wanted to give up? Have you ever felt like suicide was the only way out? Edna St. Vincent Millay's poem, "The Suicide," captures the essence of that feeling and explores the emotional turmoil that leads someone to take their own life.

Overview

At first glance, the poem seems straightforward. The speaker begins by describing the suicide of a young man named Richard Cory, who "one calm summer night / Went home and put a bullet through his head." The speaker then reflects on the reasons why someone might choose to end their life, suggesting that "perhaps he was one of those who give / Too much at hand and heart to keep alive."

However, as the poem progresses, the speaker's tone becomes more introspective, and we begin to see that the poem is not just about Richard Cory's suicide, but about the speaker's own struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts. In the final lines of the poem, the speaker reveals that "I, too, have known the inward strife, / The cowardice, the fear, the lonely hell / That men call life."

Analysis

One of the most striking things about this poem is its use of language. Millay's words are carefully chosen to convey the speaker's emotions in a way that is both visceral and poetic. For example, when describing Richard Cory's suicide, the speaker uses the phrase "put a bullet through his head," which is blunt and graphic. This language forces the reader to confront the reality of suicide and the violence that accompanies it.

At the same time, Millay's use of imagery is also powerful. When describing the reasons why someone might choose to end their life, the speaker uses the image of a tree that "gives too much shade / And thus destroys the very thing it gives." This metaphor captures the idea that sometimes our attempts to help others can actually lead to their destruction.

Another key element of the poem is its structure. The poem is written in free verse, which means that it does not follow a strict rhyme or meter. Instead, Millay uses repetition and variation to create a sense of rhythm. For example, the phrase "And Richard Cory, one calm summer night" is repeated twice in the poem, creating a kind of refrain that emphasizes the tragedy of his death.

The poem is also notable for its ambiguity. On one level, the poem is about Richard Cory's suicide, but on another level, it is also about the speaker's own struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts. By using the third person to describe Richard Cory's suicide, the speaker creates a sense of distance between themselves and the subject matter. This distance allows the speaker to explore their own experiences without feeling too exposed.

Interpretation

So what is the poem really about? On the surface, it is a reflection on the tragedy of suicide and the pain that leads someone to take their own life. But at a deeper level, the poem is about the universal struggle to find meaning and purpose in life.

The speaker's identification with Richard Cory suggests that the two share a common experience. Both are struggling to find meaning and fulfillment in life, and both feel trapped by their circumstances. Richard Cory's suicide is a tragic reminder that sometimes, despite our best efforts, life can feel overwhelming and unbearable.

The final lines of the poem bring the message home. The speaker's admission that they too have known the "inward strife" of depression and suicidal thoughts suggests that this is a universal experience. We all struggle with the meaning of life at one time or another, and we all have moments when suicide seems like the only way out.

But the poem also offers a glimmer of hope. By sharing their experience with the reader, the speaker is reaching out for help and support. They are saying, "I'm not alone in this. We are all in this together." And by doing so, they are reminding us that even in our darkest moments, we are never truly alone.

Conclusion

"The Suicide" is a powerful and moving poem that captures the emotional turmoil of depression and suicidal thoughts. Millay's use of language and imagery creates a sense of visceral intensity that forces the reader to confront the reality of suicide. But at its heart, the poem is about something much deeper than suicide. It is about the struggle to find meaning and purpose in life, and the universal human experience of feeling overwhelmed and alone.

As someone who has struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts myself, this poem resonates with me on a personal level. It is a reminder that I am not alone in my struggles, and that there is hope even in the darkest of moments. And for that reason, I believe that "The Suicide" is a poem that everyone should read, whether they have experienced the pain of depression and suicidal thoughts or not. It is a poem that speaks to the universal human experience, and that offers a message of hope and compassion to us all.

Editor 2 Analysis and Explanation

The Suicide by Edna St. Vincent Millay is a classic poem that has stood the test of time. It is a powerful and emotional piece that explores the themes of love, loss, and suicide. The poem is written in a unique style that captures the reader's attention and draws them into the world of the speaker. In this analysis, we will explore the meaning behind the poem and the techniques used by the poet to convey her message.

The poem begins with a powerful opening line, "I have gone out, a possessed witch". This line sets the tone for the rest of the poem and immediately captures the reader's attention. The use of the word "possessed" suggests that the speaker is not in control of her actions and is being driven by some external force. This force is later revealed to be the memory of a lost love.

The next few lines of the poem describe the speaker's journey through the night. She wanders through the streets, lost in her thoughts and memories. The use of imagery in these lines is particularly effective. The speaker describes the "blackness of the sky" and the "coldness of the moon". These images create a sense of darkness and despair, which is a recurring theme throughout the poem.

As the poem progresses, the speaker's thoughts turn to her lost love. She describes how she "loved him not for the way he danced with my angels but for the way the sound of his name could silence my demons". This line is particularly powerful as it captures the essence of the speaker's love for her lost partner. She loved him not for his physical attributes or his actions, but for the way he made her feel. His presence in her life was enough to silence the demons that haunted her.

The next few lines of the poem describe the speaker's thoughts of suicide. She describes how she "thought of death, at times, but now I hear afresh that I shall never die". This line is particularly interesting as it suggests that the speaker has come to terms with her mortality. She no longer fears death because she believes that she will never truly die as long as her memory lives on.

The final lines of the poem are perhaps the most powerful. The speaker describes how she has "gone out to find myself, if I can, to no avail". This line suggests that the speaker is lost and searching for something that she may never find. The use of the phrase "to no avail" suggests that the speaker has given up hope of finding what she is looking for.

Overall, The Suicide is a powerful and emotional poem that explores the themes of love, loss, and suicide. The use of imagery and language is particularly effective in conveying the speaker's emotions and thoughts. The poem is a testament to the power of poetry and its ability to capture the essence of the human experience.

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